CourtsFamily law

Woman tells family court she was ‘absolutely battered’ by partner after child’s funeral

Man is refusing to allow mother retrieve mementoes of their deceased child from his house, court told

A woman who alleged she was “absolutely battered” by her partner on the night of their young child’s funeral has secured a protection order over a separate and more recent incident.

The woman said she had secured her own accommodation after leaving her partner but he had turned up outside her home last week in the early hours of the morning.

She said she eventually let him in because of noise and scenes he was making outside and told him to sleep on the couch. He was disruptive during the night and refused several requests from her the following morning and afternoon to leave, she said.

She said the situation worsened and when she tried to run outside he prevented her from leaving. He had told her: “If you keep annoying me, it will get worse and I will kill you,” she said.

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He had assaulted her during her pregnancy, including by throwing her down the stairs and throwing a chest of drawers at her, she said

As a result of her screaming, other people in the vicinity of her accommodation contacted gardaí, she said.

That was a “minor” incident compared to other abuse and violence during her relationship over some years with the man, she said.

He had assaulted her during her pregnancy, including by throwing her down the stairs and throwing a chest of drawers at her, she said, adding that she “should have come in here in a lot earlier”.

On the night of their child’s funeral, he was drinking, “went ape”, grabbed her by the hair and threw her against the wall, she said. When she locked herself in the bathroom, he tried to bash the door in with a hammer, she said.

He is refusing to allow her retrieve mementoes of their deceased child from his house, including a lock of hair, she said.

Granting the woman’s ex parte (one side only represented) application for an interim protection order under the Domestic Violence Act at Dublin District Family Court on Thursday, Judge Máire Conneely said she was satisfied the woman’s sworn information met the threshold for that order.

When the judge asked the woman whether she had contacted Women’s Aid, the woman replied she had and the organisation had been very concerned about her during her pregnancy.

In a separate ex parte application, a woman secured a protection order against her brother after saying she is in fear of him due to his threatening behaviour towards her in their family home.

Most of his “outbursts” occur when he is on drugs, including cocaine, crystal meth and weed, she said. “It could be anything.” Her brother is not working and is on drugs most of the time he is at home, she said.

Both siblings live in the family home with their parents. She works from home and is in such fear of her brother she locks herself in her bedroom much of the time, the woman said.

Her brother is verbally aggressive to her on an almost daily basis, has sent threatening messages to her via WhatsApp, and has posted derogatory material on Facebook which puts her reputation at issue, she said.

The woman played a recorded voice message where her brother referred to her in abusive and derogatory terms, using an aggressive tone. “It’s quite threatening to get messages like that,” she said.

A man sought a protection order, saying his wife is using drugs and attacked him on separate occasions with a brush and a cutlery fork. His children were witnessing this behaviour and his main concern is for them, he said

Her brother acts the same way towards her in person and she locks herself in her room most of the time, she said.

While he had not assaulted her or anyone else in the family home, she feared the situation might escalate and he might harm her. “I don’t know what he might do.”

Granting an interim protection order, Judge Conneely said she was satisfied there was a risk to the woman’s safety given the evidence of her brother’s aggression, threatening behaviour and the fact he is on drugs.

In another case, a man sought a protection order, saying his wife is using drugs and attacked him on separate occasions with a brush and a cutlery fork. His children were witnessing this behaviour and his main concern is for them, he said.

He said he was living in separate accommodation alongside the family home. When he told his wife he would give her a divorce, she told him she wanted him to stay in the family home “and kill you”, he said.

The judge, having watched a phone video recording provided by the man, said it showed his wife attacking him with a brush and she was satisfied there was a risk to his safety and that of the children.

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Mary Carolan

Mary Carolan

Mary Carolan is the Legal Affairs Correspondent of the Irish Times