‘Going into the Leaving Cert, half-naked’ . . . Joe Duffy shares his recurring nightmare

Radio: Duffy talks about the exams in detail so vivid it warrants a trigger warning

‘Do you still get dreams about your Leaving Cert when you’re stressed? I do,’ Joe Duffy tells his Liveline listeners

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Fri Feb 4 2022 - 06:00

These have been testing times for second-level students, what with lost school time and draughty classrooms. So when the news breaks on Tuesday that this year's Leaving Cert will be held in exam form only, it's unsurprising that the reaction of secondary pupils on Liveline (RTÉ Radio 1, weekdays) is one of profound disappointment. Less predictable, however, is Joe Duffy's show of sympathy for the students' plight, as the host talks about the impact of the exams in detail so vivid it warrants a trigger warning.

“Do you still get dreams about your Leaving Cert when you’re stressed? I do,” Duffy says. “You get dreams about going into the Leaving Cert and you’re half naked.” Bad enough that students are dealing with exam anxiety along with other pandemic worries, they now have to add the mental image of a semi-nude Duffy to their burdens.

It's another good day at the office for Dobson. Under his stewardship, the News at One has become a perilous destination for politicians

In fairness, the host is hardly alone in having bad dreams about bygone school days – even if most people don’t feel the need to share them publicly – and he seems genuinely exasperated by the decision. He is supportive as students express concern at the impact of missed school days and staff absences on their preparation. Moreover, he appears to share his young callers’ opinion that reverting to an exam-based format is a missed opportunity.

Duffy notes that after years of calls for reform, the pandemic forced change, in the form of accredited grades. “The system seemed to have great appeal and great accommodation for students, especially around mental health,” he says, “I don’t think anyone in the next 20, 30, 40 years will be having nightmares about the hybrid Leaving Cert.” Either way, he’s given them something else to haunt their dreams.

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But bigger problems loom in the coming decades. On Wednesday, Duffy helms an unexpectedly diverting discussion on environmental issues, refracted through the prism of callers’ holiday choices. He talks to Kerri, who tells of recent day trips to Rome and Milan with a winning cheerfulness, before outlining the social media abuse she received over the carbon footprint of her flights.

The host then speaks to Caitriona, who is also perturbed by Kerri’s travels, though in a more politely condescending way. “I wonder how much she understands what’s going on in the environment,” Caitriona says. She also suggests the Government should cap the number of flights people can take. “I was considering going to Nepal some months ago and I won’t go now,” she adds, by way of doing her bit.

Duffy sounds dubious. “If you really want to save the planet, lock yourself in the box bedroom for the rest of your life,” he quips. “No, there’s so many things to do here, go out and look at the nature we have,” Caitriona responds, with touching sincerity. Few callers are convinced, however. Samantha understands the environmental arguments, but feels that after the pandemic people have had enough “sackcloth and ashes”. Meanwhile, Annette is looking forward to regular trips to Switzerland to see her grandchild. Duffy asks if she’s worried about climate change. “Not overly,” comes the nonchalant reply.

One feels sorry for Caitriona, whose heart is in the right place and, more pertinently, whose worries are backed by the right science. But the discussion highlights the social dynamics that reliably add friction to environmental arguments, at least when the debate is framed as well-meaning idealists hellbent on thwarting the leisure choices of hard-working people. The truth is of course more complex, but Duffy, alert to the economic priorities of middle Ireland, focuses on the irksome small stuff rather than the alarming big picture. Even global warming can’t wilt the Liveline host’s enduring talent for taking the temperature of the public.

Meanwhile, the lukewarm response to the Leaving Cert plan is neatly captured by Bryan Dobson's interview with Minister for Education Norma Foley on the News at One (RTÉ Radio 1, weekdays). Having set the mood with a vox pop of disgruntled exam candidates, Dobson asks whether the Minister was "really listening" to the two-thirds of students who wanted the option of accredited grades. Speaking in a hesitant tone, Foley says she engaged with "all thoughts and perspectives around the table" but ultimately ditched the hybrid model due to insufficient Junior Cert data for all students. Instead, what she calls a "radical overhaul" has been introduced, with papers featuring a greater choice of questions.

But as Dobson presses the Minister, her ambitious claims seem shaky. Asked whether the new format will be communicated to schools in time for the mock exams, she suggests that rejigged papers from 2021 can be used as guidelines. “So it’s not that significant a change,” Dobson drily notes. “It’s an enormous change,” Foley replies. “Well, it’s similar to last year, you said,” the host shoots back. The more the Minister waffles about “an extraordinary reimagining of the Leaving”, the more it sounds like the easy option of a different-different-but-same exam. Easy for everyone except the students, that is.

If Foley’s performance is excruciating to behold, it’s another good day at the office for Dobson. Under his stewardship, the News at One has become a perilous destination for politicians, exemplified by Minister for Foreign Affairs Simon Coveney’s snippy appearance last year. It’s not just Ministers who get tripped up: on Wednesday Sinn Féin TD Louise O’Reilly sounds unconvincing as Dobson quizzes his guest on her party’s differing attitudes to raising the pension age on either side of the Border.

For all that, the veteran anchor eschews the intimidating approach of previous incumbents such as Sean O’Rourke. Instead he reaps dividends through his quietly doubtful questions and assured presence, bolstered by a delivery that evokes the benign authority of bygone newscasters such as Maurice O’Doherty or Don Cockburn. But that solid persona can be deceptive: as Foley can attest, being interviewed by Dobson can be a nightmare.

Radio Moment of the Week

On Wednesday, Ray D'Arcy (RTÉ Radio 1, weekdays) invites another DJ to co-present, even playing his guest's radio jingle instead of his own. But what might seem like a bold step is in fact an oddly poignant encounter with 91-year-old Patrick Murphy, a hospital radio DJ in Bradford. Murphy tells D'Arcy about his working life in England, before taking the hospital gig a decade ago to distract from the "sad and lonely life" of a widower. Murphy also knows his music: the owner of 20,000 CDs, he easily discusses the merits of reggae vocalist John Holt over torch singer Shirley Bassey. D'Arcy enjoys the conversation with his fellow Kildare native: Murphy is a sprightly guest, it's a nice story, plus there's no risk in asking the older DJ on to his slot. At least one would like to think so.