Swapping places with the crew

GO NICHE:AH HERE. I've heard it all now. It's bad enough having to check ourselves in for flights and hold on to wet hotel towels to save the planet, now tourism bosses want us to work on our holidays?

Costa Cruises, an Italian outfit, has rolled out its new ViceVersa initiative, which allows passengers to “experience the thrill” of donning crew uniforms and serving guests.

Not only will they have to work, but they will lose valuable holiday time being trained up too. Are they mad?

“To fully play their new roles, Costa Club members will be supervised and trained by the ship’s cruise director. In this way they will discover all the behind-the-scenes secrets of their new jobs,” goes the blurb.

Like what, how to carry a tray in a heavy swell? Pass the sick bag please.

Any passenger daft enough to go for it will wear Costa uniforms with special ViceVersa logos, so staff and passengers will know them for the eejits they are.

Once prepared, they will work for one day as crew members in different positions: guest services, tour escorts, cruise staff, waiting staff or cooks.

Yeah right. Like you will say goodbye to your own hot stove to go slave over theirs?

Incredibly the first ViceVersa cruise is out there somewhere between Dubai and India on a 21-day voyage. The next one departs Venice on July 7th for a 10-day trip around Greece, Israel, Turkey and Croatia.

There’s even a round-the-world option departing on December 28th, from Los Angeles to Singapore – unless they are letting the passengers take the wheel too, in which case who knows where it’s headed.

Meantime, given the vice versa moniker, one can only presume the real crew will be faffing around in your stilettos drinking pina coladas. Now there’s a job worth landing.

* costacruise.com