Joan and Mary Lou trade vitriol as Billy opts for literary insults

If it's Thursday it must be the Joan and Mary Lou show. Yet again it dominated the Dáil day and yet again the vitriol levels rose. This week's words of insult included "coward" (Joan to Mary Lou and vice versa) and "pickpocket" (Mary Lou to Joan), although Billy Kelleher chose some literary vitriol, comparing the Government to Scrooge and to Fagin the pickpocket in Oliver Twist.

Later he upped the insult barometer, claiming Minister for the Environment Alan Kelly would go down, not as the Artful Dodger from Oliver Twist "but as Bill Sykes, a bully boy when it comes to taking money from social welfare payments".

The issue was the decision to bring in legislation to allow water charges payments to be taken from the salaries or social welfare payments of those who don’t pay. This policy is being dealt with by the Minister for the Environment and the Minister for Justice, but it was Labour’s day at the Dáil helm so the focus was on its Ministers. Tánaiste Joan, as usual, came out ready to trade verbal blows.

There was the warm-up round with Billy, who stressed the ability to pay had not been taken into account for social welfare recipients. Joan reminded him of Fianna Fáil’s legacy, as she does every time the party raises a touchy subject. This time it was Fianna Fáil’s cut of €17 a week to social welfare.

She said he was slandering social welfare recipients, claiming he implied they did not pay their bills. Billy told her she was passing legislation that would take no account of ability to pay. “I’ll take lectures from a lot of people, but on this issue I won’t take one from you,” he said.

Referring to the reported comments of Minister for Finance Michael Noonan that some people were allergic to work, the Fianna Fáil health spokesman said “they are allergic to Labour”. Joan talked some more about Fianna Fáil’s well-ventilated failings.

Then the Sinn Féin deputy leader came out. Mary Lou said the Tánaiste had never answered her repeated questions about which daily necessity she proposed families give up to pay their water charges.

Now Mary Lou knew the reason for that reticence. “All along you were planning to pickpocket people’s wages, pensions and social welfare payments.”

“Low”, “sneaky”, “cowardly” . . . the words tripped off Mary Lou’s tongue. “That such a Thatcherite policy is being introduced by Labour Party Ministers makes it all the more despicable,” she railed. She said this attitude was best encapsulated in the Minister for Finance’s comments about “unemployed citizens being in his mind allergic to work” and called on the Tánaiste to speak to him about that.

Joan’s response: “I ask you if you have ever had a conversation with your party leader about various issues concerning him or are you a coward?”

To be continued . . .