House Rules: The art of showing off at home

The key is to be generous – and not to look as though you’re trying too hard

Gin and Tonic cocktail set: “lets you go beyond the boundaries of ice and a slice”.
Gin and Tonic cocktail set: “lets you go beyond the boundaries of ice and a slice”.

Showing off is an odd one. We’re not meant to do it, but deep down everyone relishes that incredibly satisfying feeling we get when we’ve just profoundly impressed someone. So, when it comes to entertaining (or being entertained), how do you strike a balance?

On its “How to Stand Out at Social Gatherings” page, WikiHow (wikihow.com), which is a constant source of not-always-intentional joy, recommends: natural looking make-up, cleaning your ears and wearing deodorant, as well as jumping into the pool and being uninhibited when it comes to laughing. Warning: WikiHow is addictive – that page led me to “How to be Exciting”, thence to “How to get Divorced in Kentucky”, and on to “How to Not Be Annoying”, which has had more than a million views.

While books of manners may tell you that the host/hostess should never outshine their guests, a little judicious showing off can make an evening sparkle. Are dramatic flowers showing off? Of course they are, but they’re lovely, and, like getting out the fancy china (if you have any), they make it clear you’ve made an effort.

Expensive champagne

Throwing money around is another option. Insanely expensive champagne seldom fails, though you do run the risk of breaking the golden rule of successful showing off, which is never to look as though you’re trying too hard. Instead, it’s really all about having fun, in such a way as to be infectious, so that everyone else gets the vibe.

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The good show-off knows that it’s a performance that also happens to be genuine – if that’s not an oxymoron. It’s about revelling in your nice table settings, extraordinary ways with exotic spices, unexpected music choices and particularly witty jokes, because you happen to really like them; and – here’s the crucial bit – being generous enough to invite other people to enjoy them along with you too. Think participation, not audience.

That's why my current favourite thing is going all Heston Blumenthal with the Gin and Tonic cocktail set by Molecule-R (€30 from Designist, designist.ie). This kit lets you go beyond the boundaries of ice and a slice, to make foam, little gin globules that explode in the mouth, and "gin and tonic caviar". Definitely a superior kind of showing off.