Miriam Lord: At last, a government may have been cobbled together

After a short Tangle in the Quadrangle, it looks like we may finally have a government.

There were still a few wobbles on the cobbles, but yesterday evening, indications from Trinity College were that negotiators from Fine Gael and Fianna Fáil were tantalisingly close to sealing their historic Provost’s House Pact.

It would mean a minority Fine Gael government, supported from the outside by Fianna Fáil and underpinned by legions of ancient Blueshirts and Soldiers of Destiny spinning in their graves.

The smiling faces of the various team members as they returned to sunny Kildare Street boded well for what looked like the imminent arrival of the 32nd Dáil, delivered in the capital city’s most prestigious address – number one, Grafton Street.

Even if nobody with an ounce of sense is taking bets on how long it might last.

For the moment though, it looks like we have political peace in our time.

That’s enough to be going on with. It could all be changed tomorrow.

From the very start, the teams messed up on the talks locations. Never mind upmarket Trinity College, or that little room on the margins of Government Buildings: negotiations should have taken place from the outset in Dublin Zoo.

With a real elephant in the room.

And a locked door.

That would have expedited matters.

Instead, we endured weeks of muttering about “the elephant in the room” whenever the subject of government formation was raised.

Nobody, it seemed, wanted to acknowledge its presence. But in the last few days, its existence was grudgingly accepted by the teams from Fianna Fáil and Fine Gael.

Whereupon they both made a big fuss of deciding whether to recognise it or not.

All very theatrical.

Ran screaming

“Irish Water” is a very busy elephant. Yesterday morning, for example, Gerry Adams and Paul Murphy were parading him around the Dáil chamber and demanding immediate legislation to do away with the creature.

Later on, it was brought to meet Enda Kenny and Micheál Martin, who, if the reports were to be believed, both took fright and ran screaming from the room, and each other’s company. A lot of trumpeting to the media followed about this being a rogue elephant. Sure how could either party be expected to deal with it?

A bit too much trumpeting for the suspicious of mind in Leinster House. Particularly when the story of this “tense” incident between the two leaders was subsequently played down by spokespeople from both parties.

“Cordial,” they declared. “Very cordial.”

Once Kenny and Martin had formally recognised the elephant at their high-level meeting, their government negotiators would be authorised to re-enter the room in Trinity and re-establish contact with the Irish Water elephant.

But had they?

Expecting fireworks

Fianna Fáil’s Jim O’Callaghan and Fine Gael’s Simon Coveney were seen enjoying lunch, in no great hurry, in the early afternoon. Leo Varadkar was in the chamber for most of the time for the health service.

In fact, the only thing of any interest around the place was the Labour parliamentary party meeting, where some were expecting fireworks and blood on the carpet. Would the party leader, Joan Burton, emerge unscathed?

It didn’t help that there was a paramedic wandering around the corridors nearby with “Ambulance” written in large letters on the back of his jacket.

But the meeting passed off relatively uneventfully.

Then everything was about the “blink.” Who would blink first when confronted with the Irish Water elephant: Fine Gael or Fianna Fáil?

This, of course, had nothing to do with government formation. Rather, it was all about the next election. There seems to be an acceptance on all sides that whatever mish-mash of an administration emerges, it will stagger along like a tipsy sailor until it collapses at the first sign of trouble.

The parties are painfully aware that whatever decisions they make now will be thrown back at them by a merciless electorate.

“Make Enda history” is another strong theme.

Fine Gael wants to do its best by Enda Kenny and give him that historic second consecutive FG taoiseach honour for the history books.

The rest . . . well, the rest just want to make Enda history.

There was some movement by teatime and plenty of blinking when the negotiations started up again, both teams blinking in the strong spring sunlight as they made the short journey from Leinster House to the Provost’s House in Trinity.

They were still very cagey.

We wondered if there would be a 9pm finish again? “We could be out by five,” shrugged one of the Fianna Fáil negotiators. It was almost 4.30pm.

“We are seeking to play our part,” said Jim O’Callaghan, adding that the while he hoped the talks would be constructive there had to be a time limit. “It can’t go on endlessly.”

Good faith

His Fianna Fáil colleague Michael McGrath agreed. “We recognise how anxious people are for this process to be concluded . . . but clearly there are policy issues that we want to have addressed.”

But everything would be done with the best of good faith, “and if there is good will on all sides then agreement can be reached in the interests of the country.”

He added “The art of any negotiation is compromise.”

They were all talking about compromise. The new name for the elephant in the room.

The Fine Gael team were equally upbeat, in a cagey way.

“We’re going into the talks in a positive frame of mind,” declared Frances Fitzgerald, although she wasn’t sure if both sides were prepared to compromise.

“Well, that remains to be seen. I mean that’s if you want to get to a negotiated position – there is always compromise and discussion, so that’s the intention.”

A couple of hours later, and they were out again, all smiles this time.

A brief tangle, then a wrangle on the quadrangle, followed by a soft landing on the cobbles and then, maybe even today, the production of their Provost’s House Pact, the Number One Grafton Street Agreement.