Why did the junior minister cross the road?

DÁIL SKETCH:IT SEEMED for a time that the Taoiseach's recent junior ministerial cull was having a profound impact on question time. Tánaiste and Minister for Enterprise Mary Coughlan stood alone on the Government benches, despite having three Ministers of State in her department. They are Conor Lenihan, Billy Kelleher and Dara Calleary.

“I note that the Tánaiste is alone today,” remarked Fine Gael’s Leo Varadkar. “I am aware that her junior ministerial ranks have been somewhat depleted.”

Coughlan remarked that one of her junior ministers was in Russia and another in Bahrain. “I sincerely hope another man is crossing the road,” she added.

Coughlan did not match the locations with names.

She said that the two abroad were doing work on her behalf and that of the State.

“I am delighted to hear that,” said the ever-helpful Varadkar.

So who among the three was crossing the road on his way from the department to the House ? TDs waited with bated breath.

Some 15 minutes later, Lenihan entered the chamber. Varadkar remarked that he was glad to see the Tánaiste accompanied by a colleague.

“I was beginning to think she was somewhat isolated in the Government,” he said.

Coughlan replied that she was far from isolated.

“That is not what I hear,” said Varadkar.

“Tell me more,” said Coughlan. The Tánaiste went on to praise the “fabulous team in the department, made up of myself, the Ministers of State, secretary general, assistant secretaries and all who support the department”. She just about stopped short of thanking Ceann Comhairle John O’Donoghue for the use of the chamber.

Sinn Féin’s Martin Ferris made a rapid exit from the same chamber when he incurred O’Donoghue’s wrath.

Ferris claimed that members of the armed Special Branch had raided the houses of fishermen in west Cork. He refused to resume his seat when O’Donoghue ruled him out of order.

“Just one second, a Cheann Comhairle, you are from a coastal and fishing community,” said an angry Ferris. “And you know what I am talking about.”

“I know,” replied O’Donoghue, “but it is not a question appropriate to the Order of Business.” The Ceann Comhairle ordered him out. As Ferris gathered his papers and left, Minister for Justice Dermot Ahern remarked: “That is what he wants.” Ferris’s party colleague Arthur Morgan, who shares the same Louth base as the Minister, said that the Kerry North TD had no option but to do what he did because he could not get answers.

“There are many people up my way who want answers,” replied Ahern. He did not elaborate.

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