Deborah-Anne de la Harpe’s quirky 2023 season continues in Denmark

Quirky season

Few, if any, Irish internationals can have had a quirkier 2023 thus far than Deborah-Anne de la Harpe. It was back in February that she was a surprise inclusion in Vera Pauw’s squad for a training camp in Marbella and a friendly there against China, the Australian-born wing back, daughter of a mother from Antrim, making her debut in the game.

She hasn’t appeared since, though, having struggled in her 45-minute appearance, but on the club front it’s been an eventful summer, the 23-year-old joining HB Køge in Denmark – Kyra Carusa’s former team – from Sydney FC.

Things are going nicely – a week ago she scored a zinger in a, gulp, 14-0 cup win over the snappily titled NordØstfyens Forenede Fodboldklubber, and on Saturday she scored again when she came on in the team’s opening league game of the season, a 5-0 win over Kolding IF.

And she’s one of just seven Republic internationals still involved in the Champions League, the others Aoife Mannion (Manchester United), Claire Walsh, Emily Whelan, Aoife Colvill and Abbie Larkin (Glasgow City) and Diane Caldwell (FC Zurich). Never a dull 2023 moment.

Ugly sideline row with Mohamed Salah shows Jürgen Klopp’s power has waned

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Stunning Gallagher goal gives Chelsea 2-2 draw away to Aston Villa

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Everton confirm Premier League survival from relegation with 1-0 win over Brentford

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Premier League wrap: Late penalty sees Burnley rescue a draw with Manchester United

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‘I’ll let anyone join’

It’s not entirely unusual for football supporters to be disgruntled with their clubs’ transfer activity, not least when the windows are about to shut and they’re hoping for the last minute signature of a mega star. Or at least someone half decent. And then it’s announced that they’ve signed Martin Podhajsky.

It’s highly likely that the FK Usti nad Labem faithful asked “who??” when the Czech third division side unveiled the 22-year-old, and it’s very, very likely that he’ll struggle to make an impact for them.

Why? Because, according to ESPN, he has never played football in his life, “only Fifa on the computer,” said Usti owner Premysl Kuban. So what’s going on? Turns out that Podhajsky’s father has paid the club 500,000 Czech koruna (around €20,000) to sign him, with the promise that he will be allowed play 10 minutes of football this season.

“If someone gives me half a million koruna, I’ll let anyone join,” said Kuban, “we don’t have any sponsors.” So, if the team is leading 3-0 at some point, Podhajsky will be brought on and positioned up front.

Of course, if he ends up scoring a hat-trick, it’ll be money well spent – by his Da. At which point FK Usti nad Labem will probably sell him to Chelsea for €150m.

Word of mouth

“I don’t know what your honeymoon was like, but mine didn’t involve losing the greatest player in the history of this football club on the eve of the transfer window.” Ange Postecoglou dismissing any notion that he’s in the middle of a honeymoon period at Spurs, not least because he’s still recovering from losing Harry Kane.

“There’s no pecking order, mate. There’s no chicken coop. There’s no farm animals.” Postecoglou again, this time on whether Hugo Lloris would be his first or second choice goalie this season.

“I have no nostalgia for England, I played many years there. I’m happy to have finally arrived at a top club.” How much is Al-Hilal new boy Aleksandar Mitrovic missing Fulham? Not a lot.

Quote of the week

I only have a beer when we win an away game - last year I almost became an anti-alcoholic

—  Jurgen Klopp on becoming near teetotal last season after Liverpool lost eight games on the road

In Numbers

21: That’s how many of Spain’s 23-strong World Cup-winning squad have refused call-ups for their next games in protest at their federation’s running of the women’s game. A mess of the unholy kind.

Word of mouth 2.0

“I’m getting very tired of that captain of the Netherlands. Can he still handle the level? No, he’s on his last legs. I never thought of him as a star. He looks good, but I don’t think he’s a very good defender.” Dutch pundit Johan Derksen sending no love at all in Virgil van Dijk’s direction.

“We don’t want to deify him too much but from the first moment when he started training, we veterans looked at each other and said ‘ah, this guy knows what he’s doing! Technically he is crazy, he is very complete. He is very intelligent.” Real Madrid captain Dani Carvajal deifies Jude Bellingham.

“Pressure is for tyres.” Was Newcastle’s Callum Wilson stressed out when he had to take that penalty against Brentford? No.