Cents & Nonsense: Rats. That's right, rats! A new development has gone up behind my home. The builders who park near by say that the hedge of the local park is "alive with rats".
Disgusting. Can't you just see them all squirming around and squealing with delight? I'm talking about the rats, not the builders.
Buildings go up, rats are displaced and then they scurry into plain view, perhaps squinting at the sunlight. We pretend these creatures don't exist until we're actually confronted by them. Maybe the sight of one makes you want to gag or perhaps you get a little sweaty?
Rats are like that other "R" word we've all been avoiding. I'll say downturn here but you know what I mean. A new economic reality is dawning, no matter how much we cover our eyes and ears and hope for better days. We can walk around the rat, run from it or simply deal with it.
In a lovely piece of timing, yesterday was the beginning of the Chinese New Year. It's the Year of the Rat.
Since many of us are already suffering from the downturn blues, maybe it'll do no harm to see if there's anything to this ancient Eastern calendar. I'm very sceptical, of course, but isn't it worth a detour if it distracts from the bad economic news coming from the US?
The character traits of each animal in the Chinese calendar's 12-year cycle are taken very seriously. When possible, families plan births, weddings and the launch of new business ventures during auspicious years.
The good news is that Asian cultures welcome the Year of the Rat. Rats symbolise aggression, wealth, order and charm but also have an association with death, war, pestilence and atrocities.
Children born in a rat year are energetic, adaptable and they easily overcome any obstacles. Those traits will certainly come in handy as we negotiate rising food prices, interest rates and inflation and decreasing property prices this year.
Rat years are considered a time of great opportunity. It's the time to collect and save, as bleak years are expected to follow. It's not a year to take chances or unnecessary risks. Speculating and overextending yourself during a rat year can have dire consequences, particularly because rat years are marked by fluctuating prices in the stock market and commodities.
Maybe there is something to this and it's time to start thinking like a rat. I'm not suggesting you should spread disease, leave shiny trails of dirt from your belly or chew through cables.
In a slowdown, you need to be really savvy - get rid of debt, ensure savings are not gnawed away by inflation and invest steadily and wisely to take advantage of bargain-basement prices.
Rats make the best of what they have, so it's time to look at lifestyle debts such as credit card bills, overdrafts, personal loans and car loans. They're getting more expensive so you should pay them off with any savings. There is little point in saving unless the interest on your account is beating the inflation rate.
Investors in a rat year are told to think long term and, considering the price of Irish bank shares lately, that's really good advice. Most pensions here have some exposure to financial stocks so it's probably best to avoid a peek at your fund performance unless you're retiring very soon.
These wily rodents also create opportunities from the things that humans discard. Downturns are a bargain-hunter's dream. If you have the stomach for it, you'll find deals on office equipment, homes, cars and boats that have been repossessed.
The best thing about rats is that they sense danger well before others even know there's a problem. There's a reason for the proverb: "Rats desert a sinking ship." If you can, get out of any bad financial situations now or soon it might be too late.
A few words of caution: don't get too friendly with your inner rat. This is a short-term strategy. A long-term relationship with the rat mentality can lead to serious problems. At university, I knew a Goth girl who regularly came to class with her white pet rat with red eyes. It stayed close to her skin, inside layer upon layer of black shirts. Sometimes, it popped its head out of her shirtsleeve or collar. The girl called herself "Death". I'm not sure what she called the rat.
The economy is sinking - it's time to make like a rat and scavenge for value where you can find it.
Margaret E Ward is a journalist and director of Clear Ink, the clear English specialists. cents@clearink.ie
