Thanks to Riverdance and its ilk, the Irish have a reputation around the world as a dancing nation. But the reality of when, where and whether the Irish are allowed to kick up their heels is another matter. It may sound absurd, but there will be no dancing at the crossroads in Sneem during its festival. "Sneem festival revellers will be breaking the law if they decide to dance over the next two weeks of celebrations because any form of twirl around the marquee dance floor is strictly prohibited," said the Kerryman.
"Incredibly, dancing will now be prohibited in the festival marquee in Sneem for the duration of the festival because of the committee's failure to secure a dance licence.
"An application was made at both Sneem and Tralee District Courts last week to secure bar exemptions and a dance licence for the duration of the festival, but due to a loophole in the law, only bar exemptions were granted.
"In court, Judge Humphrey Kelleher told the festival committee's solicitor, Mr Vincent Rogan, it was a case of `late drinking and no dancing or dancing and no late drinking.' "
The committee opted for drinking. Does this mean that drinking is more important to Irish culture? Heaven forbid.
It will be almost impossible for the committee to enforce the no-dancing rule, said Ms Katie O'Carroll, chairwoman of the committee. "All we can really do is put signs up around the marquee saying `no dancing'. If the law is enforced and people are found dancing, we could be fined anything up to £1,000," she said.
Whether Bill Clinton will be dancing or limping when he arrives in Ballybunion, the Ballybunion Golf Club wants him anyway and they are still anxiously awaiting confirmation of the US President's arrival dates. Indications are the visit will take place on either September 4th, 5th or 6th.
"Thousands of pounds worth of green fees will be lost to the club, as Mr Clinton's group are likely to be the only golfers using the old course that day, for security reasons," said the Kerryman. "This means that dozens of golfers from throughout the world who booked in advance to play the famous course will have to be cancelled."
The Wexford Echo said refugees were getting a "warm welcome" locally and responded to the "embarrassing editorial" by its rival, the Wexford People, which claimed refugees were frightening old ladies and attempting to seduce impressionable young girls. The truth is "not a single file has been sent to the Director of Public Prosecutions concerning any Romanian refugees", said the Echo. Galway could become the "silicon valley" of the world health-care business, which would be worth billions of dollars to the local economy, said the Connacht Tribune.
Mr Kieran McGowan, chief executive of the IDA, believes Galway is ideally placed for health research, development and manufacture. The only possible boundary on such development was the availability of top-class young graduates to work in the field, although educational institutions in Galway were "responding remarkably". A "serious jobs scam" involving abuses of the student summer jobs scheme has been uncovered in Mayo by the Department of Social Welfare, said the Connaught Telegraph. "At the centre of the controversy are allegations that a small percentage of students are involved in underhand 50/50 deals with scheme sponsors over the £600 salary for 200 hours of work.
"It is understood that rogue students, who leave for other jobs after signing up to a scheme, agree to pay back half of the wages to the sponsor in return for being registered for daily duties," said the Telegraph.
According to Kerry's Eye, blue flags have been removed from two Irish beaches this summer and a third - the famous Banna Strand in Ballyheigue, Co Kerry - will soon lose its flag due to the unauthorised development of sand dunes and the intrusion of caravans.
If it's "moving" and it's a "mystery" then it must be a piece of religious statuary, right? Try again. In Annascaul, Co Kerry, the moving object was none other than a humble bog. At Paddy Hickson's farm, the huge amount of July rainfall caused a slab of bog 100sq ft and 6ft deep to slide downhill for 150m, said Kerry's Eye. Paddy can do nothing but watch the bog for further movement and hope that it stops raining soon.
A call for a "ban on hooters" by the GAA has been made by Ms Mary Carroll, an ardent Kerry football supporter and resident of Kilkenny, where she owns a pub and restaurant. She told the Kilkenny People that at the Munster Football Final "it was impossible to hear the band playing" and "the last verse of the national anthem was completely drowned out by youths with these hooters".
She wants the GAA to take action before some innocent fan has their hearing irreparably impaired. The GAA might like to cast its mind to the Army deafness debacle for guidance.
