The Samaritans are seeking more volunteers, in particular to handle increasing calls from older people, writes Anne Dempsey

Could you be a good Samaritan in 2004 and beyond? At this time of year every branch of Samaritans is recruiting volunteers, with the Dublin branch also looking for people aged 50-plus.

Older volunteers are well suited because they may be available during the day, are able to make a solid commitment, bring particular life experiences and help to balance the age profile of the organisation. Recent studies show that one in eight Irish people over 65 have suicidal feelings regularly or occasionally, for these the older listening ear could be particularly valuable.

Dublin Samaritans' recruitment drive begins with an information evening in Dublin tonight, but whether you are 18, 38 or 58 - and all age groups are welcome - what would you be taking on if you went forward?

Kevin Cronin, who is 62, and Judy Taylor, who is 70, have almost 40 years of Samaritans experience under their belts between them. Cronin joined 25 years ago, in the midst of a busy working and family life. "I saw an ad for volunteers and felt I had a little time to spare. Without knowing too much about it then, the type of work struck me as being very valuable," he says.

Taylor was 56, with her family reared, when she applied to train as a volunteer. "I was never very good at the bring-and-buy, coffee-morning, fund-raising circle and I wanted to do something, give something back, as you say. I am quite good at not telling people what to do; I knew Samaritans didn't give advice and felt this approach was something I could do."

Both were accepted for training after an initial interview. "The most important thing I learnt was about listening, how it's so hard to listen," says Cronin. "Through the training, role play, reflection, I began to learn to listen. There is a sense before you get into it that maybe you're not doing anything. As Judy says, you're not giving advice, so I had to learn how effective listening can be." Judy agrees. "In normal conversation we don't listen with both ears - and sometimes we're not listening at all. One of the last lecturers we had talked about listening with the 'third ear', listening to the nuances, listening to what has not been said."

Volunteers are eased into the work with plenty of support and guidance. "Most of your cases are to do with human relationships and the concerns that can arise from these. Our aim is to help people try to express how they feel about whatever is going on. This is valuable, because often you don't have time, don't have space to know how you feel. You might feel anger, but underneath there may be hurt of some sort. Saying how you feel can be a release and a relief," says Taylor.

"You don't always know what the call is really about. I would think some of the work is about people who don't fit in, who are lonely, depressed, isolated, who have trouble with relationships. People can be defined by their life experiences. Listening can be hard, because we don't do the cheer-up bit, though we can help people validate their feelings. Unless you express your feelings you may not really understand them. Telling someone helps you know yourself as well as them, and hopefully it will be a step towards coping," says Cronin.

The Samaritans' message is to call if you feel suicidal but remember that you don't have to be suicidal to call. Volunteers are quite upfront in mentioning the S-word. Taylor explains her approach. "If it seems right I would bring in something about living and life itself. Outsiders often say that will put the idea of suicide into someone's head, but it's not like that. Sometimes a caller will say, 'No, I never thought about suicide, it's nothing as serious as that,' but there is often the response, 'Well, I do think about it,' or, 'I have thought about it.' Suicide is such a taboo subject that mentioning it gives people permission to talk about it if they need to."

Why does listening help so much? "Real listening is rare these days," says Cronin. "You are listening without judgment, without baggage, without criticism, trying to help them talk about it, open yourself to them. Sometimes there may be solutions that people can't see, so you try to encourage them to look at their options and to find their own responses." Taylor adds: "People are bombarded with advice from all quarters - friends, family, media. We give time, space and pace. There can be silence in a lot of conversations, and we just stay with the caller; we're still there."

In an age that expects every problem to have a solution, the toughest calls to deal with, says Cronin, are from people in severe, ongoing difficulty. "People in terrible situations, very sick, terminally ill, in poverty, with little support - and as far as you can see there is very little they can do. I can feel very sad after such calls." Taylor adds: "As Kevin says, there are people in ghastly situations, though often at the end they say, 'Thank you very much for listening to me,' and we still see a value in being there." Volunteers may suggest that a colleague call someone back later on if they are particularly concerned. Samaritans also offers services by letter, by email and face to face.

Volunteers go on regular refresher courses and, says Taylor, receive constant support. "After a very difficult call, when you might be feeling inadequate, you can go to your team leader and talk through your feelings, so that you don't take problems home with you. So we are Samaritans to one another." Cronin continues: "Samaritans has a very good structure. We have a three-year rule - everyone changes their role after three years - so as well as being on the phones, which is the one constant, you get an opportunity over time at leading, training, being treasurer, director, all the jobs in running an organisation. It gives you a very broad base." Samaritans asks its volunteers to commit to at least three hours a week, with an overnight shift every two months.

Both Cronin and Taylor see a value in having volunteers of every age. "If you live long enough you have a sense of how arbitrary life can be," says Cronin. "I feel fortunate at how my life has gone. If it had gone another way I could be a caller. This gives you a humility when listening to people who have been through so much." Taylor says: "We aim for a uniform response and believe that the age doesn't matter in terms of the service we give. In personal terms, as an older person, over the years you learn when to talk and when not to talk; you learn patience and, dare I say it, a bit of maturity."

Both also say their involvement with Samaritans has helped them grow and develop themselves. "We are afforded the privilege to help people discover their inner feelings and to keep them company for a little while at a particular time in their lives," says Taylor. "It is such a privilege to be allowed to be close to people at a time of crisis," agrees Cronin. "I've got far more out of it than I've put into it, and the kind of person we are looking for is not someone who feels they have all the answers but someone who may be a bit diffident and wonders if they could do it. If they have the commitment, with training and support, they can."

Places are limited at tonight's information meeting, so book on 01-8727346. The venue is Dublin Samaritans Centre, 112 Marlborough Street; the meeting begins at 8 p.m.; you can find more details about information nights, and about the organisation generally, at www.samaritans.org; its helpline is 1850-609090