Hands off Pixar, writes DONALD CLARKE
God, Pixar films are useless, aren't they? I mean, Ratatouillewas bad enough, but that Wall-Ething was a bleeding disgrace.
The company had such potential as well. A few years ago, John Lasseter's studio, the most significant player in computer- animated entertainment, was riding high on gems such as Finding Nemoand Cars. Now they're trying to sell punters digital sewage better suited for nourishing the roots of computer- generated hydrangeas. Get up the yard, Lasseter.
Now, you might imagine that only somebody with a screwdriver lodged in his brain would hold the deranged views expressed above. You'd be wrong. Earlier this month, speaking to the New York Times, one Doug Creutz expressed concern about the direction Pixar was taking. Mr Creutz, who works for some Wall Street firm or other, had been looking at the trailer for Up, the studio's forthcoming release, and he did not like what he saw.
Up, which will premiere at next month's Cannes Film Festival, concerns an elderly gentleman who, disgusted at the modern world, attaches balloons to his house and attempts to fly to South America.
“The worries keep coming despite Pixar’s track record,” Creutz said, pausing to twirl his moustache. “Each film it delivers seems to be less commercial than the last.”
Richard Greenfield of Pali Research, which does whatever those firms do, went so far as to advise readers to sell their shares in Walt Disney, Pixar's corporate partner. "We doubt younger boys will be that excited by the main character," he said of Up.
It seems that mean old Pixar has so lost its way that it doesn't even plan to screw pocket money out of distracted toddlers. At this point, the studio has no plans to license any toys related to Up. The corporate analysts are already looking nostalgically back to 2006, when Carsgenerated $5 billion worth of merchandise. Never mind that it was Pixar's worst film (by a mile). Just feel the delicious thickness of its dubious wad.
You don’t have to be a body- pierced anarchist to feel slightly revolted by the philistinism of these cynical capitalist stooges. Pixar has made millions for its investors while delivering some of the most innovative popular entertainment ever seen.
Wall-Edeserves more than Oscars – it deserves to appear on banknotes. It deserves its own national holiday. Yet, hunchbacked over their desks like Mr Potter in It's a Wonderful Life, the corporate analysts can remark only that it failed to tick enough demographic boxes.
The good news is that John Lasseter, despite his jolly shirts and informal manner, is a stubborn sod who has never allowed himself to be pushed around by the desiccated calculating machines who sign the cheques. Aside from anything else, Lasseter remembers that he made his millions by offering the public something they didn’t then know they wanted.
A film made on a computer about talking toys? Who’s going to watch that? Everybody, as it transpired.
So sod off, money-grabbing lackeys!
