A tale of two taoisigh as Bertie and Albert make the running

Going to an early opener is never a good idea

Going to an early opener is never a good idea. Pub or racecourse - it's going to cost a lot of money, and then there's the rest of the day, or the rest of a festival meeting, to get through.

Headaches are forecast.

There was a time when the two evening openers at the Galway Races would ease an optimistic punter into the maelstrom of a punishing week. These days, Ballybrit is almost as crowded of an evening as it is during the box-office afternoons, and bookies make no allowance for the windy gambler trying to wager a tentative euro on the learner slopes.

This event is huge. Like house prices, attendance numbers and betting figures continue to rise year on year, despite all the expert opinion saying it can't possibly keep going on an upward curve.

READ MORE

There has to be a crash.

"No," say the people in charge. This is a full and plenty and more getting-ready gig. And look, there's Bertie Ahern in the parade ring, having had a word in Michael Smurfit's ear, and his money is on a 12 to 1 shot by the name of Diego Garcia.

Bring me the head of Diego Garcia on a plate? Bloody sure - he romped home at 12 to 1 for An Taoiseach, which should provide him with some handy holiday money when he departs for his annual break in Kerry tomorrow.

Smurfit is a bit like royalty at these things. But then again, if man of the people Bertie can talk to him . . .

We wished him a happy birthday. Michael is about to turn 70 - a major milestone in anybody's life. "I don't talk about those things" he murmured, so we turned the subject to the Ryder Cup. He beamed with pride. "The infrastructural development has started. Four of the main stands are up, and the tented village is under way. It will be the biggest tented village in the history of the State."

What? Bigger than the Fianna Fáil tent at the Galway Races, which is so big, that 100 acres of newsprint cannot contain its vastness and Joe Higgins gets a fit of the vapours at the very thought of its enormity? "Oh, yes," smiled Michael, thawing out. The birthday, he conceded, is this weekend, and he's off to Monaco, on a yacht, via Genoa, to celebrate. Apparently, if we were to believe some deluded people in the Fianna Fáil tent, with 5,000 of his closest friends.

This is no ordinary race meeting. On the way down in the train, there were young women, toting large Brown Thomas bags and hat boxes, who wouldn't know a fetlock from ham hock. They managed to find their way to the dining car, whereupon they produced champagne glasses from their spectacular designer bags and happily quaffed the Bulmers on offer beside slightly smelly aul' fellas stuck into racing pages they snaffled from discarded copies of the morning papers.

If you wanted style, it was there in the cut of the gib of the Brideshead Revisited group who pitched up in the Owners and Trainers Bar, dangling a large silver cup by the ears like Sebastian Flyte's teddy bear.

Turned up there were the Irish senior rowing eight champions from NUI Galway, resplendent in their blazers and not sure what to do with the trophy they won on Inniscarra Lake in Cork the weekend before last. One of their number, Breffni Morgan from Cork, wore a maroon-coloured blazer, while the rest were attired in navy. Breffni, it turned out, was sporting the Harvard colours, where he is currently studying medicine.

Nothing for it but to introduce him to An Taoiseach, particularly as their trophy is known as "The Big Pot", and everyone wants to get the big pot in Galway. Bertie duly posed with them, before pressing some flesh in the crowd. Opinion polls aside, he will have been buoyed by last night's results.

He's on holidays from tomorrow, and can't wait. He's hoping he might get to Kerry airport to meet his two daughters, Georgina and Cecelia. Proud Dad Bertie told us that he hasn't seen either of them in ages, as Georgina has been touring the Far East with her husband Nicky, of pop band Westlife, and Cecilia has been living in Paris, putting the final touches to her latest works.

"I can tell you that filming is definitely going to begin on her first book, and some of it will happen in Ireland," he said.

Meanwhile, former taoiseach Albert Reynolds was enjoying a rare moment at the races. Albert is no slouch when it comes to landing a bet, but he has never done too well as an owner.

Yesterday, Sorry Al romped home in the second to land him his second-ever win as a connection. His horse is also part-owned by two other former politicians (Fine Gael's Donal Carey and Seán Barrett) and three Clare businessmen. A delighted Albert accepted the trophy from Matt Jennings of McDonagh properties, the sponsors.

The horse was named Sorry Al because Albert had been left out when the horse was first run, despite telling the lads he "wanted to be in on the horse". His cross-party colleagues then "bought in for him."

Attendance last night was 27,000. Attendance in the Fianna Fáil tent was also up, at 310 guests, and 500 are expected today at €400 a head.

Tomorrow is Ladies Day. We don't expect to be in the running, but haven't ruled out having a shot at best turned-out horse.