Book records humiliation and pain of rape

PALE, spectre thin, dragging on a cigarette and wearing black, as we are told she has done since New Year's Eve 1991 ("in mourning…

PALE, spectre thin, dragging on a cigarette and wearing black, as we are told she has done since New Year's Eve 1991 ("in mourning for her lost virginity," as it says in her book) Lavinia Kerwick joked and chatted happily with a group of reporters yesterday. She was in Dublin to introduce her book Little Girl, the Lavinia Kerrick Story, by Sunday World assistant editor, Ms Micheline McCormack.

Suffering from anorexia nervosa, she now weighs "between three and four stone", but feels she has turned the corner in her fight with the disease. For the past three weeks she had been helped by the Eating Disorders Association.

It was "vital" for rape victims to have time "alone" with their loved ones so they can recover from the ordeal, Ms Olive Braiden, of the Dublin Rape Crisis Centre, said before the publication yesterday.

"A Romeo and Juliet story gone wrong" was Lavinia's own description of the six month romance with William Conroy which ended with the rape that brought her to national prominence. The book includes a detailed account of the crime.

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It is the first time this has been done. As Mr Conroy pleaded guilty, for which he received a suspended sentence, Ms Kerwick was prevented for legal reasons from giving her account in court. In the book Conroy appears in dark colours.

We are told he didn't like school, was a bit of a loner, became "badly depressed" when a previous relationship ended, was possessive, drank too much, had poor dress sense, and seemed preoccupied with the death of his brother, who he had seen crushed by a tractor. He talked a lot about hurling and motorbikes, and he was 17.

She was 18. A "lively teenager" who "always had friends", and, loved English at school. She had a wide range of interests. On Nelson Mandela's release she had written in her diary: "I can't believe it. He is free at last."

She had known William Conroy all her life. Although they had been going out for six months, she wasn't serious about him. He was "not the man with whom she wanted to lose her virginity", according to the book.

It was launched by Ms Braiden, who spoke of her "enormous courage". Ms Kerwick thanked her mother, "the most powerful woman in the world", who had pulled her through many dark days. She dedicated the book to all women who have known "the dirt, pain and humiliation" of being raped. She hoped judges would read it with an open mind.

Chatting later, she said she wanted "to get away from the rape victim role, and I hope to turn the corner with this book".

Although "to a certain extent" she may have been used by women's groups "but in a good way", she has no regrets about going public on the rape.

She does not "hate" Mr Conroy. "Both" were victims. Both had been let down by the system, she said. He should have been sent for counselling. She thought "it might well be possible" that they would talk at some future date. But she felt the book would be a "surprise" to him.

Tonight she is on the Kenny Live television show, and tomorrow she will be signing copies of her book at Hughes and Hughes bookshop in the St Stephen's Green Shopping Centre, Dublin.

Patsy McGarry

Patsy McGarry

Patsy McGarry is a contributor to The Irish Times