THE liveliest Cannes press conference of the festival was given by the exuberant Spice Girls to announce their first film imaginatively titled Spice, The Movie - which shoots next month and will be rushed into cinemas for Christmas. Before any questions were allowed, the Spices insisted the assembled press should perform a Mexican wave - which proved easier said than done since many of those who packed the conference had no idea what that involved.
"The film is a celebration of London in the 1990s, of our inner and outer struggles and our dedication to our fans " gushed Geri, aka Ginger Spice. The group will be taking a hands-on role in the auditions, said Mel B., aka Scary Spice. "We won't be, sensitive in the auditions," she said. "If you are good, you are good. If you are crap, you are crap." The movie will chronicle a busy week in the life of the Spices, leading up to their first live performance, and Richard E. Grant will play their manager.
It will be directed by Bob Spiers, a TV veteran of Fawlty Towers and Absolutely Fabulous, and will be, we were told, the group's Hard Day's Night. As for the future of the band, Victoria, aka Posh Spice said: "We might end up with a fat bloke like Elvis, or we might end up with 10 kids. Who knows?"
. AS ever, the crowded Cannes market yields a range of titles highly unlikely ever to turn up on the marquee of your local cinema. This year's offerings include Rhinoceros Hunting In Budapest, Conversation With The Beast, The Slaughter of the Cock, Dreams Against A White Background, Beyond Hypothermia, Rossini Or The Murderous Question Of Who Slept With Whom, and from schlockmeisters Troma Films, The Killer Condom and Tromeo and Juliet.