PROMISES: The ticking of the countdown clock to Election 2002 is becoming increasingly audible, and so too are the appeals of politicians for your vote. Their pre-election pledges cast a dizzying spell, and one could be forgiven for thinking "did I hear that before . . . or was I dreaming?" when one learns of the latest grand plan to reform the health system, improve public transport, eliminate poverty, and secure world peace.
Help is at hand, however, for the mystified voter. Promises Promises, an occasional column, offers a guide to the strange and wonderful world of the pre-election pledge, an ephemeral and spectral entity which has the ability to resurface more times than a synchronised swimmer - yet flees from your grip, like a fistful of water, when you reach to claim it.
Masters of the art of political promising, Fianna Fáil (and by association, the PDs), led the way this month, announcing various schemes which had already been trumpeted by the Government but presumably didn't get enough media coverage for their liking.
These included the proposed creation of more than 700 new hospital beds, which were already announced in the National Health Strategy three months ago, and are contingent on the recruitment of, at present, non-existent nursing staff; and the development of a €7.2 billion metro system for Dublin.
The latter proposal, described by the Minister for Public Enterprise, Ms O'Rourke, as "the biggest infrastructure project ever undertaken by the State", was approved by Government some 18 months ago. Yet still it hasn't progressed beyond a crude diagram, etched seemingly in great haste on a map of Dublin.
Fine Gael, meanwhile, steered clear of grand plans, concentrating instead on more topical election pledges.
Amid disquiet over illegal dumping, it promised to establish a National Waste Management Authority to promote recycling and co-ordinate dumps. With Aer Rianta director Dermot O'Leary in the spotlight, it committed itself to proposals which would see Oireachtas committees scrutinise ministerial nominees to State boards. And as industrial strife hit the healthcare sector again, it pledged "a new deal for carers".
All this caused Labour leader Ruairí Quinn to bemoan the advance of "auction politics". Not that his apparently strong feelings on the subject stopped him from announcing on one of his first pre-election walkabouts a fortnight ago Labour's intention, if elected, to build a new general hospital at Loughlinstown, in the Dún Laoghaire constituency.
Pledge of the month: No competition here; Fine Gael's €90 million proposal to allow Michael Noonan, Jim Mitchell and 487,998 other investors in Eircom to offset their share losses against their taxable income.
Mr Mitchell lost an estimated €3,500 after purchasing €12,700 worth of the company's shares. Mr Noonan gambled a tenth of that figure, and while he didn't admit to being "duped" and "seduced" himself, he claimed many investors were (bless 'em). Mr Noonan blamed the Government for creating this dubious category of victim, and said its role in the "fiasco" warranted recompense.
That drew a swift response from the Taoiseach, who warned the Fine Gael proposal might set a dangerous precedent. And he had a point. If the electorate were compensated for every fiasco in which the Government played a part we could be bankrupt before Christmas - whoever's next in power.
What Fianna Fáil (Charlie McCreevy) thought: "Fine Gael doesn't have a monopoly on ridiculous ideas but this one is in the premier league of such ideas."
What Labour (Ruairí Quinn) thought: "The idea of appealing to individual sectional groups on an individual basis without looking at the overall picture of society, without looking at what society needs, is regrettable."
Exaggerated claim of the month: The Taoiseach's "announcement" last Monday of what the Government described as the "largest building programme in the history of Irish education". Details were promised on delivery of a speech by Mr Ahern at a training college in Dublin.
Teachers, parents and pupils awaited with bated breath. What they got was a review of investment, which had already been budgeted for, in sub-standard schools. The only "announcement" was of a survey of school facilities, due to be introduced over the next two years.
Labour described the announcement as "a total non-event". Fine Gael said it had "all the hallmarks of panic".
Admission of the Month: Politicians normally leave it to those in rival parties to expose their promises as re-hashed, vote-grabbing aspirations, never likely to see the light of day. As a result, it was refreshing to hear the Minister for Finance, Mr McCreevy, expose the Minister for Health's "announcement" of 700-odd hospital beds for what it was.
"The hospital beds were announced some months ago," said Mr McCreevy last Tuesday on a visit to Brussels to meet EU finance ministers. All Mr Martin had done, he said, was "identify" the hospitals which would benefit under the plan. Ouch!
Dustin the Turkey Award for most ambitious infrastructural project: A strong contender is the Government's plan to build a fully-functioning underground public transport system, the first route of which would be up and running within five years. The prize, however, goes to a proposed €250 million light rail tram line from Oranmore to Barna being championed by the Green Party's Galway West candidate, Niall Ó Brolcháin. Why the winner? Well, unlike the metro scheme, a Luas line through Galway, which could be part-financed by EU structural funds, is - like Dustin's once mooted DART extension to Dingle - at least possible.
Rushed press release of the month: "Govt's metro announcement and timetable grossly misleading, if not downright honest - (Olivia) Mitchell." - Fine Gael can't make up its mind on the Government's re-released public transport plan.
•Keep us posted with details of election promises from your area, including (crucially) where and when they were made. Promises Promises, which will appear occasionally on Saturdays between now and polling day, may be e-mailed at: promises@irish-times.ie
