WELL, this is a relief. At last I'm out of the closet as far as The Beatles are concerned. I can now confirm I do not think The Beatles are the greatest thing since Lycra. In fact, I find all this Beatlemania business a bit of a bore. There, I've said it.
There are those who will dismiss this as nonsense from someone too young to know any better. They're right. I am too young to remember anything much about the Fab Four. What I do know is enough.
Now Oasis, on the other hand there's a band.
Don't get me wrong I haven't been throwing myself in front of their stretch limo in West Cork this week or attempting to get my hands on their cast off underwear, but I am a fan.
Oasis are incredibly popular. It's stating the obvious, but sitting in the stand at Pairc Ui Chaoimh on Wednesday night and seeing the reaction of the crowd before Noel had touched his guitar or Liam had sung a single note told its own story. These guys have charisma. They sneer, they swagger, they smile, sexily, and tales of their debaucherous behaviour are legend (and, more importantly, true).
They know instinctively what to say to shock and make headlines. They have acres of street cred, posing, posturing and fighting among themselves. And hey, that's what they are supposed to do they're rock stars.
Noel writes brilliant songs that just stick in your head and won't go away, and you don't care cause Liam's sings them so well. Their current album (What's the Story) Morning Glory has outsold any of The Beatles' albums. The music is less bland than The Beatles' songs. And it also has tonnes more sex appeal, as do the Gallagher brothers, who are in your face and arrogant. Their playing more than matches up to their posing.
After listening to a brilliant set you find yourself wondering what weird, wonderful and daft things they are going to get up to tonight. There's none of this heading home to bed to protect the vocal chords they are setting standards in rock `n' roll behaviour.
Perhaps if I'd had older influences who were big Beatles I would instead be defending their absolute supremacy, but in fact the only musical influence I can remember from childhood is an Abba tape, which seemed to have been played during every car journey we ever went on. Supertrooper was a particular favourite. (Doesn't say much for my own street cred).
Later, I was a teenager of the 1980s let's face it, there isn't much to reflect on there.
Now, don't get me wrong, I've always respected the Beatles, a bit like I respected the nuns in school. I knew instinctively it was bad to speak ill of them.
I have never owned any of their albums, or known many of their songs. I do remember Paul McCartney singing Mull of Kintyre, and duetting with Michael Jackson. I remember John Lennon for his round glasses and the time that he was shot. Recently I was babysitting a four year old and we watched an episode of Thomas The Tank Engine narrated by Ringo Starr.
That sums it up for me really. It's cute but I can't ever imagine Noel or Liam narrating a story about a train that has a personality. The Magic Roundabout would be more their scene.
In the current issue of Hot Press, Oasis are aptly described as the musical equivalent of Manchester United. "They're massively successful, they're immensely good at what they do and if you aren't a fan, chances are you're an un-fan."
The Beatles did define the 1960s and it is a sign of how good they were that they are still spoken about with reverence and listened to today. Oasis have landed at a time when there are many more distractions. Then it was just rock `n' roll and movies. Now it's multimedia, MTV, CD ROM, the Worldwide Web, Mutant Ninja Turtles and whatever you're having yourself.
The brilliance of Oasis is that they have managed to get to the top despite all that. Who knows if they will still be spoken of in 30 years' time? Who cares? They are of their time, and that time is now. And if that means people like Michael Jackson won't be buying the rights to their songs, I'm sure Oasis won't mind.
There was a quote from the Los Angeles homes on the bottom of the Oasis tour posters Oasis is a teasing glimpse of what The Beatles might have sounded like today." Yeah, but if The Beatles were in Cork this week they would probably have been playing support.