Some people think this is the best time in history to be alive. Maybe it is. Still, we seem to struggle on fundamental levels to set things up in ways that most people (rather than only a few) can fulfil their potentials and realise their dreams. While we've made many good gains, some of what we do isn't working. Yet, we remain committed to these ways of thinking instead of looking for new perspectives, writes Shalini Sinha
This is a time when we seem to be under more pressure and have access to less leisure time than ever. The culture of "overtime" is taking over in the broadest sense, at the same time that social support networks are breaking down. We are losing the skills to deal with each other's emotions effectively, favouring image and pretence over genuine but awkward connections. All the while, we are dying in greater numbers from stress-related diseases.
This cycle, that carries on and is gathering momentum, began several generations earlier and is set to continue unless we do something. It is time to consider what isn't making sense and how to see things differently. Exploring this effectively will eventually bring us to the question of how we treat children and the current state of childhood - whether you see yourself as someone with a role in the lives of children or not.
All of us were young not so long ago, and there are many fabulous things we might remember about that time. Unfortunately, however, this is also a time when people believe it is normal, even logical, not to take us seriously.
Children are considered "half-people" - half-intelligent, naive, fanciful and not worthy of the same respect or consideration as adults. As a result, many of us struggle today to see ourselves as complete, worthwhile and able to succeed.
Our fears, rigidities and perceived limits were drilled into us, and not things we were ever born believing or expecting.
As we have got older, we have no doubt learned to hand them forward to the next generation. Thus, creating the life we want will be linked necessarily to getting things right for the young people in our world, finally.
It's possible that this is not as violent a society as years gone by: battering has been outlawed, the workplace has health and safety regulations, and we've avoided a massive world war for three generations. However, the weapons we have now kill many more people at a time, from a distance. Many more people than just our defence and enforcement forces witness war and terror via our television media.
Furthermore, young people are being sexualised and becoming sexually active younger. We now think it is normal to separate between human relationships and sexual activity. At the same time that young people have become the marketing target group for violent entertainment, they are also the primary focus for cigarette and alcohol advertising.
Although young people really need adult love and support, increasingly all the adults in a household are working, and working longer.
The rate of relationship breakdown continues to gain momentum and, in the scramble to get things right for separated parents, there is no doubt that children of separations are also facing a great deal of fear and grief.
Reliable and loving relationships are needed by all of us, yet we remain unable to re-examine how this society sets up and develops relationships in order to establish more that are joyous and don't break down.
Most of what's not working in society is obvious to young people. Given half a chance, they would let us know exactly what needs to change. Rather than take their good advice seriously, we undermine them as only half-intelligent, half-aware and half-trustworthy.
On the contrary, it is when we are very young that we are most likely to be in touch with our full intelligence, creativity and good sense of self. We are immensely perceptive, take in everything, evaluate and say what we see.
When we are mistreated, we make it apparent by our behaviour and know that things should not be internalised but dealt with outside of ourselves. In fact, there are many reasons why babies, toddlers, children and teenagers deserve our respect.
It is time we considered a shift in perspective and change in priorities. There is real value to including young people fully in our lives. Recovering respect for them allows us to recover an interconnectedness and respect for our own thinking. It also gives us an opportunity to listen to how things really are and what needs to be changed. Our relationships with them can give us profound insight into changes we can make in our own lives and changes we can make towards realising our dreams.
All this is possible, but action must be taken.
It is completely worthwhile to seek out and establish long-term relationships with young people, regardless of what stage of life we are at. In order to really be allies to them, however, we will also need to become active in our society. Many things need to change - work patterns, lifestyle priorities and the quality of our relationships. We have the potential to get things right.
Anything is, and always has been, possible.
ssinha@irish-times.ie
Shalini Sinha is an independent producer/journalist, and a counsellor on equality issues. She has lectured on women's studies in UCD, and presents Mono, RTÉ's intercultural programme.