Too busy living to let MS get in the way

Yvonne McGoldrick looks the picture of health

Yvonne McGoldrick looks the picture of health. Tall, slim and tanned after a family holiday in Portugal, she's at home in Rush with two-year-old Niamh playing and chattering around her and being lifted up for regular cuddles.

Yet McGoldrick, aged 40, has multiple sclerosis (MS), a disease she was completely unfamiliar with two years ago.

It is to counter such general ignorance that the Multiple Sclerosis Society of Ireland holds its first information day - MS Uncovered - in Dublin on Saturday, September 4th.

McGoldrick's world began to change in July 2002 when she gave birth to Niamh. She and husband Edmond have three other children, Eoghan (14), Jenny (11) and Niall (six).

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"I would have been very active and would think nothing of taking the kids for long walks. But soon after Niamh was born I noticed my right leg beginning to drag. I began to trip, and was exceptionally tired, a tiredness you wouldn't believe.

"At first, I put it down to having had a baby. But it was more than that. At times I was so tired I could not even speak to the children, it was like a brain shutdown, like trying to drive the car without petrol."

She also experienced occasional loss of strength and dexterity in her right arm and hand. Concerned, sometimes very frightened, she battled on. "I didn't say anything for a long time. I'm very independent. But at times I lived in terror with a fear of the unknown."

It was Niamh's developing abilities that finally spurred McGoldrick into action. "Niamh was learning skills that I was losing, and I realised that she was getting to do things that I was having to let go of. Once I made an appointment to see the GP, I knew I had crossed a line."

She was sent to a neurologist, where tests finally diagnosed MS. "I was very disappointed but relieved at the same time that there was a reason, that I was not imagining things. I learnt that there is no cure, but that MS is treatable. I asked the neurologist only one question 'will I rear my children', and once she said yes, that was all I wanted to know.

"We told people quite carefully. It was difficult at first to reassure my father, but I remember saying 'no, Daddy, I won't die from MS, I'll die with MS'."

Or in her case, live positively with MS. The condition is managed with the drug Interferon, which she self-injects three times a week, to reduce the risk of a relapse. "I don't like having to inject, even after a year, I still don't like it, but it's a means to keeping me well.

"My delayed diagnosis was not harmful, because my condition didn't worsen in that time. As far as I can understand, some people are genetically disposed to MS, and a life event can trigger the symptoms. So it might have been childbirth, we may never know."

A year on, this is still a busy and involved mum, but there are adjustments. "Shortly after I was diagnosed, Niall started school. It's a mile away and I had always walked the children there and back. I tried it for a month but I was literally dragging myself. I gave in and Niall went on the school bus. The first day I went to collect him at the end of the road, I cried all the way. Walking them to school is an important time as they are telling you everything that happened. It was a loss.

"There are other things. If I lift a cup of tea in my right hand, I have to support it with my left. Sometimes when feeding Niamh, my wrist will just give out and not turn the spoon.

"I love crosswords but after about five minutes I realise I can't apply the same pressure to the pen. I can still walk to the shops, but need to sit down and have a rest before coming back, so I do that. It takes longer to do the garden. You learn to pace yourself.

"My symptoms will never go away, but with the help of Interferon, hopefully, I will not relapse."

MS has been compared to the uninvited visitor who arrives at your house, complete with baggage, never leaves, instead spreads belongings through every room.

McGoldrick feels this is less the case in her family. "The children have become protective of me, but I've become more stubborn and want to prove I can do everything for myself! Eddie is very supportive and was prepared to do the injections if I felt I couldn't.

"I've read that a positive attitude can lessen the likelihood of another attack and I believe it. Again, I take my cue from Niamh. She lives completely in the present and I'm doing the same.

"I believe there are other people out there with undiagnosed MS. I would say to them, if there is anything here that you identify with, if you say 'that's me', do something about it. Nothing is worse than living with the not-knowing. What I would like people to know is that there are many with MS just like me, just getting on with their lives."

About MS

Allen O'Connor is chairman of the Multiple Sclerosis Society of Ireland: "MS is a serious condition which damages the central nervous system - the brain and the spinal chord - so that nerve impulses between the brain and other parts of the body are distorted. It's one of the most common neurological diseases in young adults with 250 people, typically aged between 20 and 40, diagnosed here each year. It is not fatal, there is no cure and causes are not yet fully known.

"MS is a variable disease with variable symptoms and they're often misunderstood. The most common misconceptions are that MS is fatal and untreatable and that people can't work and will end up in a wheelchair. This can and does happen. However, many people have mild MS, they cope, they never develop severe disabilities, while treatment options continue to develop."

MS Uncovered takes place in the O'Reilly Hall, UCD on September 4th, 10 a.m. to 5p.m. All welcome. For further information, tel: 1850 233 233 or e-mail: convention04@ms-society.ie