THE widow of murdered Co Armagh taxi driver, Mr Michael McGoldrick, yesterday made an emotional plea to terrorists to stop the violence so that their son, born three months after the brutal killing, can grow up in peace.
Mrs Sadie McGoldrick was pregnant with Andrew Michael when her husband was gunned down near Lurgan during the Drumcree standoff in July.
Mr McGoldrick was last seen before he picked up a fare at Centrepoint in Lurgan at 12.15 a.m. on July 7th. His body was found near the Derryhirk Inn, just outside Lurgan. No one has admitted the murder, but it is strong believed renegade loyalist paramilitaries were involved.
"The first thought that came into my mind was: `why did they shoot him, sure he wasn't even Irish?' and he had the broadest Glasgow accent. I keep asking myself how," said Mrs McGoldrick.
"Michael was not a political, he had a knack of seeing both sides of an argument. Politics here was never discussed because it was more about religion than politics, he said. Michael believed more in the social issues. He never formed an opinion of here. In the community he grew up in it was a mixed community, and he would never have been biased."
The couple were married nine years ago last May. They lived in the North for six months then moved to Glasgow where Mr McGoldrick worked as a psychiatric nurse in the Victoria Infirmary. He used to visit Northern Ireland every year to see his cousins.
The couple returned to Northern Ireland in September, 1989, but Mrs McGoldrick said the Troubles had not really worried them. "Michael always said every area has its problems and there was a growing drug problem in Glasgow. He loved here. He knew more people here than I did and I lived here all my life", said Mrs McGoldrick. "He was very outgoing."
When they came home, Mr McGoldrick went to Lurgan Technical College, where he achieved three A levels within a year. He studied English and politics at Queen's University and graduated with a second class honours degree two days before he was murdered. He wanted to be teacher.
When he started taxi driving they were concerned, but Mr McGoldrick was of the opinion that everything was risky. "It was something that I was more conscious of than Michael was. He just thought people would think he was just a daft Scot and so who would touch me."
She had a message for his killers. "If they could see the devastation that they leave behind and the lives that they wreck. I have thought about it quite a lot and you know they must never have had no love. They must not know what love is to be able to destroy somebody's life and take away love, and really Michael's death has furthered no cause.
"I can't see at all what it has achieved and I honestly can't see what any more deaths can achieve apart from leaving children without their fathers.
"When the ceasefires were in force there was a calm. People were that much more relaxed and I don't know why anyone would want to return to bombing and killing. It's the randomness. Michael wasn't involved in anything. He never would have voiced a political opinion.
"And you think when you are not involved that nothing like this will ever come to your door. But it doesn't work like that. And even now when I go up the town and I see people walking past, I think, why Michael?" said Mrs McGoldrick as she broke down in tears.
To the loyalist paramilitaries who are contemplating a return to violence she simply said: "Don't. To me Michael's loss was much more than the circumstances surrounding his death. It doesn't matter how he died or for what reason. The fact is he is gone and nothing is going to bring him back. I don't have any hate. I have anger.
"When they took Michael's life they took my life. Everything we did together. To have to do things on my own now is just . . ." and her voice trailed away, tears streaming down her cheeks.
She is very worried about her, daughter Emma: "There was one day she had read something in the paper about some people not believing in God. I told her that not everybody believes in God and she said the people who did that to daddy didn't believe in God and I said, no. She said wouldn't it be a better world if everybody believed in God.
"She is a seven year old but she is not a seven year old in many ways. She will not leave my side, and if anybody comes she watches my face and says, `now mummy, don't be crying'."
"If I'm having a bad day, she is there wiping my tears away and she says, `now mummy, I know you miss daddy but you'll have to stop crying'. I think to myself, this is so wrong that a seven year old child is worrying about her mother. She shouldn't be worrying. It's just so cruel on her", said Mrs McGoldrick.
She said she has received letters from people across the whole of Northern Ireland and from the Protestant community who said they were "repulsed" by what had happened to Michael.