Maybe Enda thought if he ran quick enough through the supermarket aisles or raced even faster in and out of the small shops he might shake off the trouble that refuses to go away.
It was never going to happen. But there was no harm in trying.
If nothing else, belting around towns and villages a long way from Kildare Street might take his mind off the damaging McNulty business – a peculiar crisis which continues to batter away at the Taoiseach’s credibility.
But it can’t have been far from his thoughts. Because time and time again when he met a voter on the byelection trail in Roscommon-South Leitrim yesterday, he earnestly asked them to give his Fine Gael candidate “a stroke”.
An unfortunate word under the circumstances.
Maura Hopkins is running for the party in Friday's byelection, chasing the seat vacated by Luke Ming Flanagan when he left for the European Parliament. She is an enthusiastic, engaging campaigner, but an under-par Enda still managed to outpace her in the powerwalking and plámás department.
Because this is what he’s good at, even though he seemed tired and not at all his chipper self.
The Taoiseach’s day began in Ballinamore, moved on to Mohill, from there to Carrick-on-Shannon, and ended in Ballaghaderreen.
He wasn’t the only senior politician on the prowl around the constituency. Joan Burton turned up to pitch for Labour’s candidate, Senator John Kelly, while Micheál Martin was back again to press the claim of his man, Ivan Connaughton, who is seen as the frontrunner.
This might explain why Micheál has nearly taken up residence in Roscommon. A win here would strengthen his leadership.
Gerry Adams, meanwhile, split his afternoon between Boyle and Ballaghaderreen. He was interviewed earlier on Shannonside Radio, taking the opportunity to shamelessly tell listeners “It’s my birthday today, and the best present I could get would be to get Martin Kenny elected.”
No water charge
Presenter Joe Finnegan asked him if he intended to pay his water charge, mentioning that Sinn Féin’s candidate in Dublin South West has indicated that he won’t be doing so.
Gerry revealed that he doesn’t have to pay the new water charges because his family home is in Belfast, so the question didn’t apply in his case. (He mustn’t be renting in Dundalk so.)
Beyond in Ballinamore, the Taoiseach, yet again, was facing a very familiar subject. What about the Seanad by-election? Is he going to vote for John McNulty – as some of his Fine Gael Senators and TDs have already done – despite the candidate withdrawing his name and asking the party not to vote for him.
Enda said he had voted and had respected McNulty’s request. Which means he either plumped for the Independent/Fianna Fáil candidate, or Sinn Féin’s choice, or perhaps he spoiled his vote.
He didn’t leave it blank, that much we know.
“Well, I filled my ballot paper over the weekend. I’m very clear on that.”
It’s about the only thing he’s been clear on as far as this saga is concerned.
Once he’d said his daily piece on Fine Gael’s ill-fated Imma-culate selection, he was free to press the flesh for the rest of the day.
Close protection
The Taoiseach’s mini-tour was uneventful, although there seemed to be more gardaí on duty than were present during his recent, more turbulent visit to Roscommon town. Local TD Frank Feighan was by his side again, on close protection duty. But he didn’t have to engage his elbows this time to muscle unwanted company away from the boss.
Enda’s visit seemed as much about buoying up the FG grassroots as it was about meeting and convincing voters. This was just as well as people were thin on the ground on a damp Monday in Leitrim.
In the afternoon, he began his lightning tour of Carrick-on-Shannon with a visit to the VistaMed company, which employs 300 people and makes medical instruments.
Then there was a quick tour of Main Street for the old traditional presenting of the babies – to be held up, admired and tickled under the chin by the Taoiseach.
First stop was a chemist where Enda posed for photographs with the pharmacists and a woman waiting for her prescription to be filled sloped away from the cameras, mortified.
Outside the Poitin Still public house, the Taoiseach pounced on an old codger minding his own business and thrust his candidate, Maura, at him.
Eyes light up
“Will you give her an aul’ stroke? She’s the only woman in the field,” said Enda, and the man’s eyes lit up in the leery style of Father Jack.
Senator Imelda Henry from Sligo was part of the electioneering team. Some of her colleagues couldn’t help but point out that the women who “knickerbombed” the Taoiseach at a dinner in London at the weekend were from a Women’s Rights Group called “Speaking of Imelda”.
And when Enda paid a call to the ladieswear shop run by local councillor Finola Armstrong-Maguire, the chuckling lads shouted “Get some knickers for Imelda while you’re in there!”
As is often the case, many of the people canvassed by the Taoiseach weren’t from the constituency.
Brazil, Birmingham, Clare and Kildare – no use at all to his candidate.
In Tesco, he had a long conversation with a man in the vegetable aisle only to be told “I’m from Italy. I’m from Turin. But I’m not a Catholic.”
At a loss for something to say, Enda trumpeted “The Holy Shroud!” and moved on.
The Taoiseach moved so fast that dissent wasn’t possible. Hands were shaken and backs were slapped before people realised he was gone. In the homewares aisle, Aine, a student from Elphin, was staring openmouthed after the retreating Taoiseach, gone before she had a chance to say anything to him.
Promises, promises
“I definitely won’t be voting for him. He said he wouldn’t put up the college fees and he did, and he promised he would keep our local hospital open and he closed it down. Then he had the cheek two weeks later to come to the Connacht final in Roscommon and stood in our stand!”
Aine says she’ll be voting for Independent candidate Emmet Corcoran. “He’s a young lad from Strokestown and he owns two businesses already. He’s an entrepreneur and wants more employment. All the young people are voting for him.”
