Teenage bullying main focus of calls to parent helpline

More than half of all calls received by Parentline now concern teenage aggression and bullying of family members

More than half of all calls received by Parentline now concern teenage aggression and bullying of family members. When the telephone helpline for parents started 21 years ago, the majority of calls were made by people who were worried about their parenting skills.

"Fifty-two per cent of today's calls are from parents of teenagers who have bullied family members or engaged in other forms of abusive behaviour," Ms Maura Hughes, Parentline chairwoman, said.

The helpline receives over 5,000 calls a year. Last year, two-thirds of calls came from parents concerned about children aged from 12 upwards. Some 40 per cent of these calls concerned behaviour al problems such as stealing, bullying, addictions and lying.

The increase in such problems was not caused by any one factor but could be put down to lifestyle changes, according to Ms Hughes. "Peer pressure is a huge factor. Some young people are very easily influenced and when they see this behaviour, they imitate it."

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Television, videos and films also contributed to the increase in teenage aggression, she said. The increasing availability of drugs is another factor.

"When parents find themselves challenged every step of the way by children who are quite young, they don't know what to do. They are constantly getting "back answers" and are finding it impossible to lay down guidelines."

Both parents working outside the home was not a major factor, she said. "Many of the calls come from women who are in the home full time, and that makes them feel worse, because they have dedicated their lives to being there for their children."

The helpline does not tell parents what action to take, she said. "We are there to listen. Parents inevitably know what to do, they just need to talk to someone about it. These problems affect their self-esteem and they think that every other family is perfect."

However, in the case of postnatal depression, Parentline does give advice and encourages callers to contact their GP or other agencies for help and support.

Earlier this year, Parentline took over the post-natal depression helpline from the Post-Natal Distress Association. Post-natal depression accounted for 17 per cent of calls to Parentline last year and that is expected to increase substantially this year, Ms Hughes said.

Parentline can be contacted at 01-873 3500 from Monday to Friday or the website can be visited at www.parentline.ie

Alison Healy

Alison Healy

Alison Healy is a contributor to The Irish Times