This week's exploding storylines

After the "Deardree goes to jail" saga in Corrie, things were a tad dull in Brookside Close. So the big bang should liven things over the week (when Brookside goes out daily) and kill two birds - and perhaps a few characters - at one time.

The explosion is part of a bid by the English soaps to hot up the ratings. They have a penchant for things dramatic down Brookside way - there was a previous explosion in the religious sect's house, and later a mysterious bug snuffed out a few boring regulars.

This time, in next week's white-knuckle-teeth-grinding-nail-biting storyline, the child-with-the-name-no-one-could-wish-on-their-worst-enemy's-child (Kylie) will be trapped beneath the rubble and they'll have to consider chopping Sinbad's chubby leg off to save her. Max Farnham, Jackie Dixon and the unborn surrogate baby will also be trapped.

Presumably they've got to do something to counteract the attention Coronation Street's Free The Weatherfield One campaign has been getting (and this week promises even more turns in the Prisoner Cell Block H-style plot). Duped-dreary-Deardree may have stretched credibility a bit, but in Brookside they make no attempt to keep their storylines low key.

As one hunk leaves, so another must arrive. So Chris - "a nice lunchbox is alright for a bit but when all you've got upstairs is an empty vacuum flask, a clever girl looks elsewhere" said Angie - is gone and Les Battersby's new found "son" arrives on his Coronation Street doorstep. But the Street's real upcoming drama may be the rumoured death of Zoe's baybee - the neglect has been signalled and the baddie's character thoroughly blackened; all we need now is the pathos.

Meanwhile in EastEnders, where they've been having their own courtroom dramas recently, Kaff from the caffy, who has been in the series since 1902 (it was black and white in them days) is departing the sunny climes of Albert Square for Sarf Africa, where there is a fry-up skill shortage. The drive-by shootings and thuggery should make her feel at home.

Meanwhile in Glenroe, Biddy made a throwaway comment that it was a good job Miley had nothing to hide as his face is like an open book. And it's true - Miley has "I slept with your cousin" written across his forehead. Biddy has been many things, but never stupid until now - how can she fail to notice how his eyes roll around his head like marbles whenever faithful marriage, or Fidelma's name, are mentioned?

If Glenroe is looking for a sponsor - as Fair City has with Hibernian - recent plotlines would suggest avoiding tractor manufacturers and fertiliser companies and go for backing from Durex.