Only in Northern Ireland does the faith you were born into seem to assume your political leanings as an adult.
After all, nowhere else in Ireland, Great Britain or Europe could you ask what school someone went to and automatically slot them into a “for us or against us” category.
Yet in Northern Ireland, if you are a Protestant who supports a united Ireland or like me, a Catholic who supports the United Kingdom, you are viewed as something out of the norm.
Having feebly put my own head above the political parapet in the past, only to find that the political ideal of civic unionism was not really on the agenda at that time, I am now more than happy to join the movement that is the Together UK Foundation.
[ Once the home of Edward Carson, the Ulster Hall never saw a night like thisOpens in new window ]
Very much non party-political, we are focused on ensuring that we have independent information that informs why being part of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland is to our long-term advantage. We embrace every shade of unionism in the UK and acknowledge that it is a very broad church.
One undeniable fact is that Northern Ireland benefits annually from a £15 billion (€17.4 billion) investment in our economy, underpinning our old age and working pensions, our free health service, our education system and our total infrastructure, including a system of social housing that is unique in Ireland.
I’ve experienced enough growing up in Belfast, educated in a convent school, the daughter of an RUC officer and through my business serving the corporate and public sectors, to know that there is truth in everyone’s perspective and a need to understand that nothing is black and white.
We have a benefits system that entices the poorest and most disadvantaged people in the world to risk their lives on boats to get here
Northern Ireland may be a complex place, but there are more complex divides around the world where democracy is a distant hope and, however we got here, we do live in a democracy.
Certainly our National Health Service is under huge strain, but it remains the envy of those countries that have to pay insurance – including in the Republic.
We have a benefits system that entices the poorest and most disadvantaged people in the world to risk their lives on boats to get here, even if our generosity as a society may at times be questionable.
Our legal system is also under enormous financial strain, but the principle of legal aid and equality of arms remains one of our greatest human rights.
That is why the prospect of a border poll fills many unionists and those who are undecided with serious apprehension. We need to learn the lessons from Brexit, where too many people voted on emotion rather than facts and the old adage of “be careful what you wish for” is resonating all too clearly.
It is a democratic right to have freedom of expression, but let’s make sure that in the debates that resonate around the dinner tables of Ireland, independently verified facts are part of the discourse.
I’m just an ordinary person but I want my voice to be heard, as well as all the shades of green, orange and grey voices that exist in this country
What we have in the United Kingdom is not perfect. Some of us have very grave doubts that those in Westminster truly believe in a United Kingdom that values each of the constituent regions equally. That needs to be addressed with more substance than soothing words.
The fact is that the status quo, while imperfect, is familiar and capable of change. However, I don’t know how being in a united Ireland would impact on our pensions, our health service, our benefits, our legal aid rights and our jobs.
We need facts, not rhetoric. Vague promises of financial support from the United States and Europe are not going to cut it if our experience from Brexit is anything to go by.
I’m just an ordinary person but I want my voice to be heard, as well as all the shades of green, orange and grey voices that exist in this country.
We may have cultural and emotional ambitions, but in the years to come we just want to know that we will be safe, can afford our bills and will be able to feed our families.
I may be a status quo unionist, but so far no one has persuaded me that radical change from a border poll will improve my life or that of anyone else.
Sheila Davidson is a board member of the Together UK Foundation. A former communications consultant, she was a member of the Conservative Party and the Ulster Unionist and Conservative Parties Coalition.