- And welcome to BBC One's coverage of the first day at Wimbledon. And let me make a little prediction.
I think this is going to be Tim Henman's year. Here on the centre court today, he begins his campaign to become the first Briton to win the championship since Samuel Pepys. Some critics say that doesn't count, because the Great Fire of London had burnt all other contestants alive in Ye Olde Tenez Inne, but frankly, I think that's a little begrudging. And Tim really looks as if he has the making of a Wimbledon championship this year. Don't you agree, John McEnroe?
- Well he certainly does if they can find that guy who started The Great Fire of London again. That was during the blitz, right?
- I'm not terribly sure, actually. And it's Tim Henman to open serve, against the newcomer from Nepal, Sherpa Norgay Tenzing, who is of course better known for his mountaineering skills. Sherpa Tenzing only took up tennis shortly after his death in 1986. And now, here he is, the first Nepalese to make it to the Wimbledon finals. Any comments, John?
- Yeah, is that a snow-shoe he's using instead of a racket?
- Yes, it is a snow-shoe, tennis rackets being unavailable in the Himalayas. Doesn't mean he can't hit the ball rather sweetly. So, all in all, Tim's facing up to a stiff challenge here today, don't you agree?
- Stiff is right. How long has this guy been dead?
- Nearly 20 years, but you know these mountain folk, got the endurance of mountain goats.
And now the centre court falls quiet, and the atmosphere is positively electric as Tim limbers up to make his first service of the 2005 Wimbledon Finals, and I'd say, he'll be hoping for an ace, don't you think John?
- Well I can kind of guess he's not hoping for a double fault. But you never know with you Brits.
- Ha ha ha, that's very funny. Not hoping for a double fault, indeed! Good to see your sense of humour hasn't lost any of its edge.
- I wasn't being funny. Jesus, you celebrate Dunkirk, Tobruk, Arnhem, etcetera.
- Ha ha ha ha. There you go again. Dunkirk, Tobruk, Arnhem! Dear me, that is good. Must remember that. Not hoping for a double fault. Ho ho ho. Now here we go, Tim Henman preparing to serve for a place in the next round.
And he serves!. . . Oh bad luck Tim! Bad luck indeed. Don't you agree that was rotten luck, John? - I do not believe it. His ball knocked the umpire out cold. God, I wish I'd done that a few times, only I would have done it deliberately. I see there's a replacement umpire standing by. That's kind of strange, isn't it?
- No, John, last year Tim accidentally killed three umpires, two ball boys, one ball girl and decapitated a lesser scion of the Principality of Luxembourg.
And now it's his second service! An artful lob! But Tensing has hobbled out of his coffin, and heavens, what a delightful return of service! That's love-fifteen, but a pretty auspicious beginning for Tim, wouldn't you agree John?
- Yes, I would. Last year, his first 15 services were double faults. But of course, they were over-arm. His second service just now was under-arm.
- Under-arm, to be sure, but pretty stylish with it. And it's Tim to serve again. . . Oh! What happened to it? I can't quite see where the ball went. Where did it go, John?
- You see the old dame in the fancy chair there opposite, with a kind of happy look on her face?
- Her Majesty? Yes, I do.
- Well it bounced up her skirt, and it hasn't come out. Not yet anyway.
- Ah. I see. And it's Tim Henman's second service to make it fifteen all. . . Ah. Love-thirty. What happened there, do you think, John?
- Well, it wasn't a bad shot, if his name was Tiger Woods. You got many ball-boys outside the ground today? Looks like you'll need them.
- Now it's Tim serving to get back in the game. Oh dear. First serve, a mis-hit, and it doesn't even reach the net. Second serve coming up. . . Oh bad luck, Tim! He's just hit a pigeon flying 50 feet above the court, and I do believe he's killed it. Love-forty, and so it's all to play for, isn't that right, John?
- Sure is. You ever see Meg Ryan in the restaurant scene in When Harry met Sally? Well, that's what the old dame seems to be going through. Don't think we're going to see that ball back in a hurry.
- And now it's Tim Henman serving to save the game. . . and he's skied his first serve, and it's gone for six. Second serve coming up. OH COME ON TIM! COME ON! Ah. That's the second umpire down and out, and game to Sherpa Tensing. But otherwise, all in all, it's looking pretty promising for Tim, wouldn't you agree, John?
- Look! That old dame's just having another Meg Ryan moment. That makes two so far. . . No, no, here comes a third.
Yeah, I kinda guess that the way things are going out there today, Tim's gonna get a knighthood for sure.
- Smashing! As I said, this is going to be Tim Henman's year.