Thinking Anew: "Everyone says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive".
CS Lewis is describing a dilemma we all face from time to time and which is discussed in tomorrow's gospel reading. Objectively, we can agree on the attractiveness of forgiveness and are happy to commend it to others.
We are filled with admiration when we see it work and marvel at the grace of those involved. Good things follow which affect not only individuals but national and international relationships as well. Sadly, on our own island we are far too preoccupied with our status as victims of history rather than seeking genuine reconciliation through forgiveness.
The second World War began on this day, September 3rd, 66 years ago. Many historians would argue that a major factor in creating the conditions for that war were the crippling penalties imposed by the victorious allies at the end of the first World War. Germany's economy was ruined, its people were embittered and resentful, and the rise to power of Hitler was assured. But lessons were learned and after the second World War enormous resources, largely American, were poured into rebuilding Germany, resulting in the stable and prosperous nation we see today.
As a result strong ties of friendship were forged between former enemies, proving that even at that corporate level the option for forgiveness and reconciliation made sense. It makes sense at the personal level too.
The teaching of Jesus on forgiveness is quite direct: forgive and you will be forgiven. The plea for forgiveness is the only petition in the Lord's Prayer with a condition attached to it. Sometimes we make the mistake of thinking that such instructions are external to us, divine commands imposed on us. But they go much deeper and deal with some of our deepest needs.
In the time of Jesus the accepted rule of life was tit for tat and this was embodied in the legal codes of his day. If a man killed someone, he ought to forfeit his life. If a man knocked your tooth out, then you could do the same to him. Jesus took a different view, as seen in his generous treatment of his enemies, notably in the words from the cross: "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do."
Let us consider why forgiveness makes sense. First of all we need it ourselves. There are actions, events, encounters in all our lives which, though they may be buried deep in our memories, or even forgotten, are sources of damaging guilt or shame. No matter how good we may feel about ourselves we all have issues that need to be addressed.
Secondly, while we recognise our own need for forgiveness, we too easily console ourselves with the thought that those who offend us are worse than we are. We deserve to be forgiven - they don't. We know this is not true but the hurt and the anger we feel can be so powerful that forgiveness is off limits. It is simply not an option. But we need to take account of what those feelings of anger and hurt can do to us and our families and other relationships. We become prisoners of the past, embittered by memories and feelings that have the potential to destroy us. When that danger is recognised, forgiveness commends itself as a way to freedom and a healthier future.
But there is another case to be made for forgiveness and reconciliation. Forgiveness, in a way, is an encounter with evil. This is very clear from the life of Jesus. Throughout his ministry, but most notably in his final hours, he was confronted by every possible form of human depravity and evil. Yet we are told that through it all he had time to console those around him and speak kindly to those who tortured him.
The reality behind all this is that he was effectively checking the progress of evil and demonstrating what St Paul recognized as "a more excellent way".
Pope Paul VI put it this way: "A love of reconciliation is not weakness or cowardice. It demands courage, nobility, generosity, sometimes heroism, an overcoming of oneself rather than one's adversary."
G.L.