Do you know your Yik Yak from your WhatsApp? Your Snapchat from your Periscope? How about OoVoo or Viber? You may never have heard of some of these services, but your child may be already using them.
Technology has opened up many exciting avenues for us and technology opens up new opportunities to children, allowing them to develop new skills that they can carry on into their adult lives. But like many new things, it also brings with it a new set of challenges. For parents, even keeping up with the pace of new technology can be a challenge in itself.
It used to be a lot simpler back in the days when PCs were the main method of getting online. The standard advice was to have the family PC somewhere accessible but public, such as the living room, where parents could easily check in on what sites children were visiting or restrict access.
However, in an era where mobile devices are increasingly popular, it’s not always as clear cut. According to the Ireland’s Digital Future report by UPC, the average Irish household now has 4.7 internet-connected devices, ranging from smartphones and tablets to smart TVs. Other reports put the figure closer to 11. That’s a lot of devices to keep track of and, if required, to try to install filtering technologies.
A decade ago, the idea of giving a 10-year-old a mobile phone would have provoked horror from many? Now, smartphones are becoming an increasingly common sight, with many citing safety concerns as a reason for buying the devices.
Simon Grehan of Webwise says the devices are increasingly being given as a present when children are making the move from primary to secondary school.
Smartphones are also more personal, he says, making them harder to monitor. Although the good news is that most children appear to be using internet services on the devices at home, on a wifi network, rather than on 3G or while out and about, implementing traditional content filtering on the home network isn’t always an option for mobile devices
John Wills, education development executive with Barnardos, says one approach parents can take is to have guidelines on acceptable use of technology, imposing limits on usage time, for example, or setting aside times when the use of mobile devices is banned, such as at the dinner table. That means the adults in the family may have to curb their own device usage, setting a good example.
Although services such as Facebook and Twitter have terms of use that include a minimum age for users of 13, these age restrictions are largely ignored by both children and parents alike.
The 13-year-old limit is more to do with data protection issues than a belief that it represents a turning point for children in maturity.
Social media accounts
“I don’t think the age guidelines are any use to parents,” says Grehan. “It doesn’t tell them if it’s suitable.” He points out that many parents assist their children in setting up social media accounts.
“It peaks in the transition between primary and secondary school. That’s often when parents let children on social media for the first time, get them smartphones, and so on.”
There is no magic age at which your child will suddenly become mature enough to deal with social media and the pressures it can bring. Like many other technologies, it will all be down to the individual child and their maturity level. That is something that is best left to parents to judge.
If you do allow your child to have an account on social media, regardless of their age, there are some recommendations that should be implemented.
Built-in privacy settings
Taking advantage of the built-in privacy settings and protections is a good place to start. Making your child’s account private, accessible to friends only instead of the wider social network, can help protect your child from unwanted or negative attention.
Adding only people you know sounds equally elementary, but it’s advice that bears repeating. One of the big fears about social media is that your child will come into contact with someone who is pretending to be younger to get closer to them. However, there are other things that parents should be more concerned about, including whether your child is able to deal with the unique social pressures that Facebook and other social media of this type can bring. For example, the number of friends a child has can be a source of peer pressure.
Trying to clamp down on social media use may not work, with children setting up their own accounts. Grehan advises that parents should stay connected to their children on social media initially, before withdrawing a bit and giving them more independence over time.
“Trust is very important between parents and children. But trust is established and earned,” he says.
One finding from the recent Net Kids Go Mobile Report was that younger children are more drawn to Instagram than Facebook. Parents should try to keep up with what services are popular and what their children are using.
For parents who want to head some of these issues off at the pass, there are ways to restrict content on mobile devices. Both Android and iOS have parental restrictions available as part of the core operating system, allowing parents to switch off functions such as the ability to install apps or to access the web browser.
But while the temptation to clamp down completely on your child may be great, experts don’t encourage it.
“Are they really going to be able to implement a ‘no Facebook’ policy?” Grehan asks.
“They’re better off being part of the conversation.”
