The London Evening Standard's Martin Chilton had a browse through a new book on West Ham last week (Boys of '86 - The untold story of West Ham's greatest ever season) and one extract in particular caught his eye. "One morning Alvin Martin was given a rude awakening. He complained to his room-mate that he had had difficulty getting a lather from his toothpaste, only to be informed by Tony Gale that he'd used Galey's haemorrhoid cream in error. "No wonder he was always talking out of his arse," quipped Gale. Uggh.