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“In fairness, if I was born and raised in Shrewsbury I’d probably be this angry as well ‘cause it’s an absolute cesspit full of inbreds.” James McClean responding calmly to the dog’s abuse he got from Shrewsbury fans during Wrexham’s visit last Thursday.
By the Numbers: 292
That’s the lowest spotted estimate for how many millions (in Euros) Erling Haaland will collect in wages if he sees out that new nine-and-a-half year contract. He could almost afford himself.
Read the room
On the face of it, someone believing they were in a relationship with Brad Pitt through WhatsApp, giving ‘him’ €830,000 to pay for medical treatment (when he’s worth $400m), and only realising that they were being scammed when news of the real Pitt’s engagement to Ines De Ramon broke, is a bit on the comical side.
And when a French woman known only as Anne revealed the bizarre tale on television, she was on the receiving end of a whole lot more ridicule than sympathy. But when the impact of it all was revealed – she was left broke, homeless and attempted to take her own life – it was time for everyone to back off. Except, eh, Toulouse FC.
Ahead of their cup game against Laval last week, what did they tweet? “Hello Anne, Brad told us he would be at the stadium on Wednesday for Toulouse-Laval. And you?”
Soon after: “We understand that our tweet may have been misinterpreted, and we deeply apologise. We deeply regret if our words may have conveyed a negative message.” Oh Toulouse.
Word of Mouth
“I saw him three years ago, he was rubbish. He’s pushing on a bit now, there must come a point, like a boxer, you go to a singer and say, ‘listen, you’ve had a good run, enough’s enough ... get off the stage’.” Not that Roy Keane has a long memory, but he still hasn’t forgiven Rod Stewart for calling him a “bully” four years ago.
“If I want to say the things on my mind about the club, I will probably get the biggest fine in the history of the Bundesliga. This is one big shit season.” Hoffenheim’s Andrej Kramaric being quite candid after a 5-0 mauling by Bayern Munich.
“I don’t want to be too rude about Arsenal, but it looks like they are scared to take advantage of the opportunity they’ve been given this season. They are crapping themselves.” Former Gooner William Gallas being, well, rude about Arsenal. And that was even before they blew that 2-0 lead against Aston Villa.
Mind at war
We sincerely hope you didn’t miss Ray Parlour’s chat with Alan Brazil on Talksport last week? If you did, the gist: they were talking about a survey that asked people which historical moment they wished they had been alive to see. The winner: the 1966 World Cup final. But Parlour offered an alternative pick.
“Do you know what, Al, winning the war was unbelievable, wasn’t it? The party they must have had. ‘Cos we’d all have been German now, wouldn’t we? For them to surrender, the Germans, was amazing. He was a little bit blase wasn’t he, Winston Churchill? He went for things and we think, ‘woah’.”
And: “It could have gone either way, but it was unbelievable how they took chances and came out on top.” You’d think he was talking about Arsenal winning the north London derby, rather than the war. Never change, Ray.
Do you mind?
Darwin Núñez bringing considerable joy to a Dublin care unit with those late goals against Brentford.
You asked..
Survey of the week: The one Crawley Town asked their supporters to respond to for their ‘rebranding’ efforts. Among the questions: “If Crawley Town FC were a character in a movie, who or what would they be?” “If Crawley Town FC was a dish, what would it be and why?” “Which animal best represents Crawley Town FC?”
Need it be said, some of the responses were quite rude, especially to the question “what would you most like to see at Crawley Town FC this season?” A “****ing goal” was the most common reply. And considering they’re fourth from bottom of League One, that wasn’t an unreasonable request.
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