I always knew I wanted to travel and potentially work abroad. I never thought it would take me to Durham, North Carolina, however.
To be honest, I didn’t even really know where Durham, North Carolina was before I moved here. Because of Covid, I moved here in September 2021 sight unseen. Covid was the greatest catalyst for something new.
Ireland was still very much in the depths of Covid restrictions and I had just completed my PhD in Human Genetics at Trinity College Dublin, which was not without its challenges during Covid.
I carried out my PhD viva from my childhood bedroom via Zoom and celebrated with a walk on the beach and a bag of chips with my parents. Not what I would have expected, but those were the norms during Covid.
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Everything is bigger here, the roads, the cars/pickups and the food portions
The daily walks in my neighbourhood, social distance catch-ups with friends and baking with my mum are what I have come to miss most about home.
My boyfriend (also Irish) and I moved here for the experience and to finally live together. With his work in Galway and my studies in Dublin, we had never had the opportunity to live in the same county.
The US provided that opportunity as he worked for an American company in Ireland and so we made the transition over here.
It might not be surprising to some that academia led me to the US as there are not huge opportunities in Ireland – certainly not well-paid opportunities for postdoctoral researchers.
The wages in the US are slightly better and enable us to comfortably rent a two-bedroom town house. One could only dream of renting such accommodation in Dublin.
The freshly-painted and newly-carpeted house we currently live in is a far cry from some of the places I lived in while renting in Dublin.
Settling into North Carolina was quite the culture shock and took some time.
The humidity and wildlife were and still are, an adjustment. The worst thing you’d encounter on a walk in Ireland is some dog litter, not a venomous snake. Everything is bigger here, the roads, the cars/pickups and the food portions.
I was pleasantly surprised by the diverseness of Durham and the wide variety of activities to do and great places to eat. The relaxed nature of the area suited us down to the ground, with plenty of breweries and lots of outdoor activities.
The people of Durham are always willing to get involved in local events. We have been to outdoor concerts, museum light shows and weekend markets and are always surprised to see the crowds that show up.
That being said, Americans tend to go to the pub early and leave by 9pm. We have found ourselves being the only people in our local at 11pm on more than one occasion.
The bigger city of Raleigh is under an hour away and even bigger again, Charlotte, is about two hours away. There is always live music, sports or anything you’d fancy really, not too far away.
When I first moved here, the locals revelled in their proximity to the sea, which is two and a half hours away – a bitter disappointment for a Déise girl. That’s like travelling from one side of the country to the other to go to the beach, I explained.
I look forward to knowing the response ‘No bother’ will suffice, rather than ‘You have an awesome day’
One of the benefits of academia is getting to travel for conferences, which has allowed us to explore many parts of the US.
We have taken in the vastness of the Rockys, danced to jazz in New Orleans and kayaked alongside alligators the Outer Banks, the big tourist destination here known for its wide expanse of open beachfront and ecological diversity.
On the other hand, the overturning of Roe vs Wade has also happened since we moved here and the tumultuous political climate that exists here is hard to ignore.
We are still very much connected to our Irish roots. I have become reacquainted with Irish music since moving here and play alongside like-minded Irish expats in the area. My boyfriend is also on the local GAA team in Raleigh.
We came to the United States knowing we would always move back to Ireland, however. As much as the US has to offer, it isn’t home.
We know the housing crisis awaits us when we attempt to purchase our first home and finding a job in both our fields in the same county is going to be a challenge.
Our lives would probably be more successful here in the US, but friends and family remain back home in Ireland.
I look forward to not having to tip for every transaction and not having to drive to go for a walk, as there is no such thing as a functional footpath here.
I also look forward to knowing the response “No bother” will suffice, rather than “You have an awesome day”.
We will remember our time here fondly and have made lifelong friends while living here. The hidden gem that is Durham, North Carolina will always be a special place for us.
Ruth Kelly is from Newrath, Waterford and her boyfriend, who moved to North Carolina with her, is Ronan Glynn is from Knocklyon, Dublin. Kelly studied in Trinity College Dublin for both her undergraduate degree and for her PhD
If you live overseas and would like to share your experience with Irish Times Abroad, email abroad@irishtimes.com with a little information about you and what you do
