Dedicated websites are providing forums for people to unburden their guilt, writes FIONOLA MEREDITH

BELFAST-BASED BBC reporter Will Leitch was surprised recently when he got a Facebook message out of the blue from an old school friend humbly apologising for breaking his favourite model aircraft, a Hawker Harrier jump jet, when they were both aged 10.

Will remembered his pal. They had both subscribed to the comic Warlord and played secret agent games communicating in code and flashing Morse messages at each other across the street. Will’s pal is now a successful surgeon. His Facebook confession reflects that his “crime” in breaking the model aircraft has been eating away at him over the years.

The internet is heaving with online confessions. Dedicated websites provide the space for people to unburden themselves of all kinds of mind-boggling secrets, from the seriously depraved to the mildly banal. But while Will’s surprise Facebook confession was from someone he knew, the majority of heartfelt mea culpas posted online are anonymous. Not surprisingly, sex-related confessions outnumber all other varieties. “I’m sorry I slept with your best friend”, and so on.

The internet allows guilt-ridden people the relief of getting their bad behaviour off their chests without having the pain and embarrassment of actually ’fessing up face-to-face.

The phenomenon gained media attention in 2005 when Frank Warren, founder of www.PostSecret.com, gave self-addressed post cards to strangers asking them to send him a secret that was both true and had not been told to anyone. He uploaded the results and the site became a Top 10 favourite with young US females and won numerous blog awards.

But how much good is this outpouring of guilt doing us? Is it the modern equivalent of traditional confession and absolution? Or is it just a lazy, complacent, way to feel better without actually facing up to our mistakes?

Even though the Vatican enthusiastically embraced the internet with its own website up and running since 1997 – operated by nuns and powered by computers named after the archangels Michael, Gabriel and Raphael – it will not be substituting online confessions for the real thing. It kicked the suggestion into touch a few years ago, citing the risk of criminals misusing confidential information intended only to be viewed by a confessor.

But this hasn’t stopped various enterprising individuals setting up their own “unofficial” Catholic-style confession sites.

Polish man Borys Cezar set up a now defunct website offering an online confessional for those who couldn’t make the time to squeeze in a real-time visit. Visitors were instructed: “Write down your sins against Lord God. Do you regret your sins? Click yes or no. Do you intend to correct them? Click yes or no. Now click on next. We are connecting you with the Lord God, please wait . . . Your sins are being transferred, please wait . . . Congratulations, your sins have been forgiven.”

But as congregation numbers continue to dwindle, other religious denominations have taken a more pragmatic approach, enthusiastically entering into the spirit of virtual unburdening. Some evangelical Christian churches in the United States operate their own confession sites, such as ivescrewedup.com and mysecret.tv, both of which abound with graphic confessions that would make your hair stand on end.

An enterprising Anglican vicar, Canon Dr Graham Kings, has recently launched a live online chat room so worshippers can receive spiritual advice from the comfort of their own home. Dr Kings broadcasts live from his north London vicarage every Saturday lunchtime. Prospective sinners are warned that the session is public and carefully moderated.

While penitents do get through to a genuine cleric when they log on to Dr Kings’s web chat, a problem with the majority of online confession sites is that the most heartfelt outpourings simply disappear into the ether.

PSYCHOLOGIST Sherry Turkle, who has researched cyber relationships, believes that many people are motivated by a desire to reach out and connect with others as much as a need to offload guilt.

Yet that sense of community continues to elude them, since most sites ban responses to confessions. However, grouphug.us offers readers the opportunity to register a virtual “hug” in response to messages.

“Father Benjamin”, a young Catholic priest, and keen blogger from Wisconsin, says he hears the confession on behalf of God and offers his forgiveness, through a human voice and a human face.

“Perhaps the reason why few people approach confession is that no one really believes that God loves them, and they think the best we can hope for is a big online hug.”

Myvesta Ireland, a not-for-profit financial crisis organisation providing advice on debt repayment, offers a “debt confessional”. “The mere fact that you anonymously enter your financial confession is a first step that you are willing to face your situation by admitting your innermost thoughts, failures and realities,” claims Myvesta, adding that “your confession will help others to know they do not need to suffer in silence and they are not alone”.

Internet confessional sites include: http://grouphug.us, www.confessions4u.com, www.ivescrewedup.com, www.mysecret.tv

The internet is heaving with online confessions.