What we recognise as a proverb is usually a neat little group of significant words, making up a phrase whose rhythm invokes a feeling of some authority – and perhaps wisdom. Certainly “a stich in time saves nine” has rescued many a loved garment or fine piece of knitting. And “all that glitters is not gold” can’t be argued with.
But proverbs aren’t all as sensible as those. We are told that “birds of a feather, flock together” but also advised that “opposites attract”. Then, should we “strike while the iron is hot” or abide by “haste makes waste”?
Which to believe?
So many easy-to-quote proverbs can have their perceived wisdom punctured by a second one which absolutely denies the first. If “you’re never too old to learn” then ignore that “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks”. Does “absence make the heart grow fonder” or should we believe that “out of sight is out of mind”? (A twentieth century revision advises “Absence makes the heart grow fonder – of somebody else.”)
For several thousand years proverbs have been spoken in a portentous tone, chiselled into marble, embroidered by Jane Austen heroines on to framed linen or posted on handsome internet greetings.
The very word itself summons involuntary respect. Quotes and slogans, old wives’ tales and catchphrases have come into common usage and gained a kind of fragile truth, even if lacking the implied moral authority of traditional historic wisdom which the word proverb conveys.
Sometimes a proverb express a truth of stunning simplicity – eg in Sri Lanka: “Eat coconuts while you still have teeth” – but with an underlying truth. And an astringent piece of humour can convey a sting to pretentiousness, eg from Romania: “You’re a lady, I’m a lady, who will feed the pigs?”
But there is also potential weakness in the veracity of proverbs whose pocket-size wisdom has been entrenched for many years – and whose original truths have not always survived the march of time. What about “the camera never lies”? That reached its use-by date in 2005 when Photoshop became available.
Or “a dog, a woman and a walnut tree, the more you beat them the better they be”. Best to forget that one, right now.
And some proverbs are simply not true. “A cat has nine lives.” It doesn’t – a cat has just one life, like the rest of us.
But proverbs can be fun. Some from the past seem amusing to the modern eye. Plautus decreed in 200BC “There is no smoke without fire” – but he’d never been to a rock concert with smoke machines. Or does “virtue is its own reward” apply to Mick Jagger, Tiger Woods or Silvio Berlusconi?
Some proverbs can use a seeming contradiction to fine effect: “Egotism is an alphabet of one letter,” (from Scotland), and from Irina Dunn in 1970: “A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.”
The contrasting images of a fish and a bicycle are no more bizarre than imagery in the range of much older proverbs, such as “an apple, an egg and a nut, you may eat after a slut.” The reasoning behind it being that in olden days “slut” simply meant a slapdash housekeeper, and an apple, egg, and nut all need to be peeled first before eating – so their insides will be pure regardless of poor kitchen hygiene.
A proverb which is taken literally can be sent down in flames. For example , “the best things in life are free.” This caught the eye of songwriter and recording manager Buddy de Sylva, who pointed out: “Yes – the moon, stars, flowers, passing butterflies – all free. And it stops right there.”
Sometimes the cryptic image of a proverb makes its meaning so obscure that whatever relevance it may have had, is lost. For instance the old observation that “ a dead bee makes no honey” is pushing its luck a bit to find any relevance in modern thought.
And it’s hard to justify “less is more”. That may very occasionally apply (such as the relevance to garlic in cooking) but on first acquaintance it seems about as a sensible as if there was another proverb advising that “fat is thin” (it isn’t!). And “what’s done cannot be undone” no longer applies to marriages being dissolved, wills being contested, or legislation being revoked.
But with the prevalence of modern “surgery-assistance” and the front-page results thereof, it’s intriguing to look at two ancient proverbs commenting on faces – original and otherwise. Juvenal in the 2nd century AD observed that “your face counts your years”. But over a thousand years later, we were advised “the face is often a smooth imposter” (Pierre Corneille, 1642). Any red carpet coverage of an Oscar-awards night will find support for his version.
Proverbs don’t have to be ancient. Some which are, have a message which survives quite well into this century. The Bible tells us “wine maketh glad the heart of man”. Others from relatively recent decades can emerge with modern relevance, even with a touch of the sardonic: “Democracy is the process by which people choose the man who gets the blame” is attributed to Bertrand Russell.
Hotelier Cesar Ritz’s 1880 slogan that “the customer is never wrong” morphed gradually into the widely said later version “The customer is always right” – but with the development of mail order and online buying, this has to be treated as a possibility which is no longer firm. Sometimes a proverb is born from the title of a book eg Walter B Pitkin’s 1932 publication decreeing that “life begins at forty”.
But there are always some whose relevance is a struggle to perceive. In China you can find a proverb which presumably is advisory : “If you would avoid suspicion – do not lace your shoes in a melon field” but the advice is only for those who can perceive whatever logic lies behind it.
[ Preposterous Proverbs by Max Cryer is published by Exisle Publishing at £9.95Opens in new window ]
