It was a bright and beautiful day. The sun was shining down on the puddles and was making them sparkle like stars. Everything was perfect and was as it should be. We went to a cute little ice-cream shop at the corner of O’Connell Street. I got a chocolate ripple ice-cream, it was delicious. And Grandad got plain vanilla one, he doesn’t like any other flavour of ice cream. He says that the one flavour will do him. While we were in the shop I noticed Grandad looked sad. I asked him what was wrong but he just smiled and said, “Nothing”.

When we got home the first thing I could see when I walked in the door was Mam. She had that worried look on her face, it looked like she needed to get something off her chest. By this time I knew something was up. Mammy sat me down and began to speak.

“Darling, you know Grandad? . . . well he is sick. He might leave one day and not come back.”

“Mammy is he going on a holiday?” I asked in a very worried tone.

“No darling, Grandad is dying. He is going to Heaven.”

I ran up to my bedroom crying, full of fear and worry. Millions of thoughts were running through my head. I didn’t know what to think. Grandad’s my best friend. He wouldn’t leave me. Maybe he’s going on a short holiday, but I am sure he will come back for me. I don’t know where Heaven is but I know Grandad wouldn’t leave me.

It was my first day at big school. I was waiting with my coat on for Grandad to pick me up, he had told me he would come with Mammy to collect me. But he didn’t. Mammy came by herself and she looked like she was going to cry. I asked her if she fell and that’s why she was crying.

“No sweetheart, Grandad is gone to Heaven,” she cried.

I asked what day he would be back, but she said he will never be back. I didn’t believe her. I waited for days to see Grandad to ask him what was going on but he never came. I was determined to find him. I sat down and began to make to make some colourful posters.

Missing Grandad

Height = very tall

Age = very old

Name = Grandad John

Hair colour = he has none really

I ran over to my press and grabbed my Dora backpack. I shoved all the posters in it and ran out the door. I hung them up on all of the lamp posts I could find outside my house. I waited days but still nobody replied. Did Grandad leave because of me? Was I bold? I don’t know, but what I did know was that I would find my grandad one way or another.

Mammy kept saying, “Grandad’s not coming back”, but I still didn’t believe her.

“You don’t know Grandad like I do. Me and Grandad understand each other. We are like pieces of a puzzle, we fit together perfectly!” I told her.

But without the other pieces the puzzle is not completed, I thought. Nanny and Mammy were always going on about some funeral for Grandad. I didn’t know what it was.

“Maybe it’s a party for when he returns,” I thought to myself.

They said his funeral was tomorrow, so did that mean he was coming home tomorrow? Did that mean I would be able to see him again?

Tuesday was Grandad’s funeral! I was right, I did get to see him except he was asleep in some funny looking bed. I tried to shake him to wake him up, but he didn’t wake up. I yelled his name a thousand times but it didn’t work. He wouldn’t wake up. I knew this isn’t the end. I don’t give up that easy.

Maybe he was hibernating like a bear so that when he wakes up he would have loads of energy to play with me and tell me all about the journey he went on. Nanny was crying at the funeral, I tried to tell her that Grandad was coming back but she wouldn’t listen.

And neither would Mam or Uncle Jerry or Cousin Tom or any of them. They all thought I was mad but I knew better. None of them know me like Grandad does. We understand each other and we know each other inside out. I had started to miss him. I missed his soft, cosy, reassuring hugs and his sweet, quiet, loving voice. I missed everything about him.

I knew deep down in my heart he would be back. That one day we would be reunited with one another. When the priest was finished speaking, Uncle Jerry, Cousin Tom and one of Grandad’s friends lifted the funny bed out of the church and into the graveyard. I asked Nanny where they were bringing Grandad.

She kept saying, “You’ll see. You’ll see, pet”.

When we finally stopped walking it was beside a big hole in the ground. They began to lower the bed into the hole. They were trying to bury him alive! I couldn’t just stand there and watch them make a horrible mistake.

I let go of Nanny’s hand and ran over to the bed as fast as I could and I leant over and blew Grandad a kiss. I also put my blankey on the top of the bed in case he needed it to keep him warm. I knew there was no point in trying to argue with everyone about Grandad. They all thought I was just some mad child. They lowered the funny bed down into the ground. By this time everyone was crying, except for me because I knew Grandad was coming back, unlike the others.

Nights went by and I couldn’t believe still wasn’t back. I thought he would have been back by then. I knew what I could do! I could write him a letter. But what address would I use?

Mammy kept saying Grandad is in some place called "Heaven" so maybe I could send it there. Who knows, maybe he would reply and come home. Oh, I couldn't wait to see him. I wondered if he would bring me back a present from his journey. I wondered where he was. Maybe he was in New York City, fighting bad guys. Maybe he was gone back in time to get me a dinosaur.

Although I deeply believed that Grandad was still alive I had a fear that he might not have been. What would happen if Grandad really was gone forever? Who would call me princess? Who would play tea party with me? Who would be there to give me a hug when I didn’t feel well?

I knew I would have Mammy but my life would never be the same without Grandad. But I couldn’t think like that. I had to think positive thoughts.

I wrote the letter on my special pink paper that smelt like strawberries.

The Yellow Cottage
Heaven
The Sky
12/4/2007

Dear Grandad,

I miss you so much! Mammy said when people go to Heaven they don’t come back, but I don’t believe her. I know you will come back, you’re only visiting God. I remember you said that when you die you want to live in a little yellow cottage. Nanny misses you too. She’s always crying. I told her that you would be back but she won’t listen.

Today is my birthday, I’m four now. You said that when I was four I would be old enough to get the pink bike that was in the shop window. I wait for you sometimes outside the shop but you’re never there. Mam says that you will never be there. Old people can be so stupid! I will wait for you no matter what they say. I can’t wait to see you. I love you so much and don’t you forget it.

Love from your princess,

Brooke xxoo

Grandad said that when I am seven I would be old enough to get the big pink bike in the shop window in town. He said that he and Nanny would buy it for me. Well, today is my birthday and Grandad still didn’t come with the pink bike. Mammy said she will buy the bike for me but I said no. I want Grandad and Nanny to be there to hand it to me.

It’s not the same living in a world without Grandad. The sky seems dull, the birds don’t sing songs in the morning and nobody smiles anymore. Everyone just saunters around the house either sobbing or with a big grins on their faces that don’t seem real. I miss him, more than anyone could miss someone.