A child's need for information about the past is no rejection of the present, the author of a new book about adoption, written from the child's perspective, tells Anne Dempsey

When Eleanor Gormally was asked to write about adoption as part of a children's book series on current affairs, she looked at what had been recently published. "A lot of it is American or UK publications, discussing fostering and adoption in a rather didactic way. I believe in the power of story to engage, of getting both kids and adults to talk about feelings, fears, sensitive material. As adoptive parents, the more resources you have to go through the process, the more equipped you are, " she says.

A lecturer in education at the University of Limerick, Gormally and her husband, Pat, adopted an 18-month-old girl from China, who is now aged three. Gormally's book, Little Lucy's Family, A Story About Adoption, is a story to be read to children and is told in the first person. Lucy feels loved and wanted in her new family while coming to terms with a sense of confusion and loss. Given the occasional media criticism of inter-country adoptions, and the sometimes stridency from both pro- and anti-camps, Gormally's book offers an important child-centred contribution to the debate.

"I wanted to explore the many ways there are of becoming a family. There are one-parent families, fostering, grannies rearing children - adoption is just another way the family is formed. I wanted to highlight the notion of ethnicity, the child entrusted to you has a life story which began before you. The adoptive parents too have the story of their process towards the child and how they subsequently adapt to the child's earlier life. While each country of origin has its own issues, these are core issues irrespective of location," says Gormally.

One night in bed Lucy wonders what her birth parents were like, and if being no longer with them means they did not love her. When her mother comes to say goodnight, the child is afraid to ask this, but later plucks up courage to tell Dad how she feels.

Gormally explains: "I have friends where this issue has come up, and the literature suggests it is something that most adoptive children think about. 'Why has this happened to me? Who do I take after? Why was I handed over? Can I tell my parents how I feel?' Some children worry it would hurt their parents to ask these questions. Reading the book together, a parent could say, 'Why did Lucy ask that question? Would you ever think any of that?' The story is also about the parental response, how we can meet and allow the child's need to talk, to ask, to have that space at home."

Parents who feel challenged by such questions need to realise the child's need for information about the past is no rejection of the present. Adoptive families are encouraged to compile two books for and with their adoptive child. One is the child's history from the moment of birth.

"You can have everything and anything to present to your child at age-appropriate times," says Gormally. "You may know the name of the birth parents, have a birth certificate. Some institutions will have records about what a child wore when they arrived, if they came with a name or not, information on the institute and its staff. Other ideas are to assemble news cuttings of what was happening the day the child was born, bring back soil from the country, as well as other pictures and memorabilia.

"The parents' road to adoption is also part of the story," says Gormally. Their desire to have a family, the preparation, their hopes, fears, the waiting, the journey out, the meeting, the getting-to-know, the homecoming with their child."

The Gormallys' own journey to adoption took three years and began with an approach to their local health board. They attended an open information evening, then after an interview were invited to a training course which they found helpful and realistic. Next came more in-depth interviews as a couple and singly, after which a social work report was compiled and sent to the Adoption Authority of Ireland. When approved, the couple received a declaration pronouncing them fit to adopt.

"We always had a grá for China, and an interest in Eastern philosophy and Buddhist meditation, so it was natural for us to turn eastwards. We were also influenced by China's one-child policy, which means that women leave children to be found because they cannot keep a subsequent child. Also China is a signatory to the Hague Convention and has a central agency which deals bilaterally with the Irish Government. The structures are good."

The fact that Ireland is now cosmopolitan may have pluses and minuses for the adopted child who looks physically different from their peers. On the one hand, it may be assumed s/he is an asylum seeker, exposing the child to prejudice that these minorities can experience. However, the presence of communities from other countries gives Irish adoptive families the opportunity to make relevant links.

"One of the huge pluses is facing the intersection of cultures in a very special way," says Gormally. "In Limerick we have a Chinese cultural group consisting of about 15 families who have adopted children from China who engage with Chinese people locally. We celebrated the Chinese New Year together and were taught how to cook Chinese dumplings.

"There is also a multicultural mother and toddler group . . . It is lovely to see my daughter mixing with other Chinese children and together they learn songs and rhymes from their country."

Many voluntary parent groups now offer country-specific information and support, she says, as well as coming up with imaginative ways to help a child celebrate their ethnicity. But is international adoption ethically right or correct?

"It's not an easy decision, but when push came to shove, we felt that in the case of China's one-child policy, it was preferable to give a child the possibility of a loving and secure environment to continual institutional care. This is something we will have to talk through in future with our daughter, but when you watch a child within an adoptive family, see how cherished and nurtured it is, witness the tremendous love between parents and child, you rest your case."

There are, she agrees, some losses. "An adopted child may lose their birth faith, they lose that part of their culture that would be transmitted naturally, the smells, tastes and texture of a country, and even the institutional care they knew."

Critics allege that adoption between rich and poor nations and families reinforces an imbalance of power and leads to corrupt practices.

"That's a huge question. Just going on our own experience, the only monies we paid were for hotel accommodation, with other costs for documentation laid out transparently on the website, which happened as it was stated. I think you have to trust the structures in place, like the Hague Convention. There are other aspects to this: evidence, for example, that institutions have had their awareness raised through contact with the West and have improved their practices. Also, some adoptive parent groups continue to work with the institutions to empower them and fund-raise for them, so the contact can be beneficial."

Little Lucy's Family: A Story About Adoption by Eleanor Gormally is published by Veritas (€9.95)