At 36 Kate Tammemagi was interviewed for her first job, as a temporary typist in trade publishing. She ended up as the company's managing director before leaving to open her own training consultancy in business behaviour. Now, 16 years later, she is in a good position personally and professionally to speak to women about mid-life career planning, writes Anne Dempsey

"I know at first hand that it's never too late to start a new career," she says.

Or consolidate an existing one. On tomorrow week, the first of a series of one-day seminars for women in their 30s and 40s, takes place in Dublin. Recent research shows that 42 per cent of the workforce are women, with numbers set to increase. Organised by the Retirement Planning Council of Ireland (RPC), the day will give women a chance to focus on life at work and at home - and also mark a broadening of the council's training remit.

But back to Tammemagi. "I was desperate, I was separated with two small kids and no income. I was forced out to work," she says, adding that years earlier she had qualified as a psychologist, but married before getting to practise.

"When I went to work for the first time it was a nightmare. I didn't know then about office culture, hadn't a clue what to say round the water-cooler. My first promotion obviously caused jealousy, but I wasn't so aware of it, I was too busy surviving. When I became sales director I felt physically ill every morning for two years before going to work. At that stage I knew all about office politics, but I chose to edit out the negative, doing consciously what I had done unconsciously."

Today she offers training on the culture of work, business relationships and group dynamics. "My take is not altruistic. I'm totally pragmatic. Companies use me to solve problems and I'm happy to call myself a fixer."

Her seminar topic is relationships at work, beginning with experiential exercises to help participants see themselves and be seen by others.

"It's important for everyone to take stock, because the world of work is in a constant state of change. You may have started out 15 years ago with a set of attitudes, and may now need to question them.

"For example, a woman may have decided she is treated in a particular way because she's a woman, feel hard done by and go round for years with chips on her shoulders. Her assumptions may have made her behave in an inappropriate way, display weakness or aggression, and so engender certain predictable reactions.

"We create our own reality. Our behaviour triggers a response, over time that is the way people treat us and so we become locked into that role."

However, changing behaviour is, she agrees, easier said than done.

"Change begins by being self-aware, finding out how others see you. First, ask for feedback from colleagues, difficult, I agree, as most of us erect barriers to protect our self-image.

"Secondly, observe people's behaviour, see how they interact with you, and with each other.

"Thirdly, join a group. Any group can contribute to personal growth provided again you are willing to learn about yourself and make changes if you want to."

Tammemagi is less interested in glass ceilings and gender politics and more into helping each participant move towards finding out what she wants.

"I have been involved in fast-track programmes where women have pulled away, realising it's not for them. Other women will want to get ahead, and I would be asking 'what's stopping you?', and help them to understand how they can make their office culture work for them. I will want to ruffle their feathers and some people will feel a bit uncomfortable. But my aim is for women to come out knowing more about themselves, thinking 'I am my greatest tool'."

The day, which is presented to women by women, also has modules on time awareness, health and finance. It is being co-ordinated by RPC's Ada Kelly and career development consultant Elaine Nicholls, and Kelly accepts that the topics are also important to men.

"We could have a mixed day, but we feel there are issues of particular relevance to women. For example, we feel that women will speak more freely about their health issues on their own.

"The whole idea is for women to step back from the day-to-day to see where they are in terms of life and career. The demographics tell us that we are living longer. Today a woman's life expectancy is 85, she will be fitter in older age. However, the era of early retirement may be over, with many women having to work for longer, so we want 40-year-old women to look at their quality of life in the 45 years left to them," she says.

Nicholls takes up this theme. "A 40-year-old woman who lives to 85 will spend 15 years sleeping, up to 10 years waiting and commuting, many hours working. One powerful exercise is to take some string and cut off these sections. Holding up the piece that remains can really bring home that the choices we make about the years we have left are very important. We will ask each woman to look at their time-stealers, and what they could do to manage that time better."

Participants will also examine their values and personality, helping them to prioritise what's significant for each in balancing career and home life, followed by hints and tips around managing any change they wish to consider.

"There are some very good books on this such as Willing Slaves - How the Overwork Culture is Ruining our Lives by Madeleine Bunting," says Nicholls (Harper Collins €19.50). "We want women to leave the day feeling affirmed in the direction in which their lives are going, including career development within the existing company."

Many women, she says, talk about downshifting, going part-time to rear children. This may be the right thing to do, but needs to be considered in the light of career long-term and its effect on pension and promotion. There is also the "what if?" factor.

"With divorce far more prevalent today, a woman who takes a career break may be dependent on the man's salary and not have considered how they would be left if things did go wrong.

"So the day is about stopping and looking ahead. For example, it is the women in the family who tend to be the carers of older parents. Perhaps now is a good time to talk to siblings and ask the question 'should I be the one having to do this on my own?' Caring for parents is a family responsibility, not a daughter's alone. Also, many working women have the primary care of the children, not always the role they want. Some women can be very negative about changing this and say 'the children are my job, what's the point in talking to my partner?' We would be asking 'well, is it all your job, you're both working full-time', and women can find that asking for co-operation, negotiating with a partner does bear fruit.

"We are great at suffering in silence and can be terrible martyrs! Sometimes it's just about looking outside the box and so seeing different options."

The first Mid-Career Course for Women, (maximum 12) takes place at the Retirement Planning Council of Ireland, Upper Pembroke Street, Dublin 2, on September 9th (9.30-5.30 p.m.), cost €350 including lunch. Further courses will run between October 7th and November 4th. For further information, telephone 01-6613139