IF you're still looking for that extra special Christmas present, how about a Spice Girls e mail address? Twenty five pounds will get you an Internet address which will read yournamespicegirls.com. It's the near ultimate in personalised; pop merchandising, an electronic mailbox which marks you out as a Spice person. But here's the rub: who is remotely interested in a U2.com or MichaelBolton.com e-mail address this Christmas? In 1996, Day glo riot girl pop is what climbs to the top of the charts, sells plenty of product and has a party. While former charttoppers like Prince and REM are experiencing panic attacks because of lack of sales for their latest albums and the old geezerzone that is U2 ups its cred rating by working with Howie B, it's a superbly marketed but supremely intelligent pop act which is attracting punters into retail outlets this shopping season.
In ways, the Spice Girls are a revolutionary as any of thosedie hard right on anarcho crustie indie collectives you're forever reading about in music magazines with ink that comes off on your fingers. While the male dominated music industry is slowly coming to terms with strong female figures, the pre Spice pop arena (Mel & Kim, Pepsi & Shirley, Louise, Kylie - the first name gang) remained something of a Top Girl cliche. Some, like Bananarama, may have gone against the grain but without ever achieving that spicy level of success. You might argue that what our famous five are now doing is little more than tarting up the Take That or Backstreet Boys formula; but such pop factory product never emerged with this sort of attitude or suss. "We are not some management led concept," insists Geri. "We all sing, we all dance, we all write the songs and decide on the arrangements and the way we present ourselves. We call the shots."
The Spice Girls are a soap opera, but without the dodgy story: lines - unless you count some predictable tabloid to do about topless pics. You know they'd never make it on to Blind Date because one, they'd outcamp Cilla and two, they're unpredictable. Five highly individual characters or, if you like, five girls with carefully sculpted characters means that there's one for everyone in the audience. In 1996, the question on everyone's lips was, who is your favourite Spice Girl? Naturally, your choice changed from week to week. Proper order - this is really what pop music is about, and not celebrating the fact that dullards like Reel, Dodgy and Ocean Colour Scene sell enough records to appear on Top Of The Pops.
Long after those stooges have disgraced themselves on the comeback trail, we'll be able to remember with a smile the chorus of Wannabe, wonder aloud what a "ziggazigg-ah" is and recall the wonderfully kooky video for Say You'll Be There. Euphoric glam, perfect sugar sweet swing, smooth but bristling soul: the debut album Spice covers all the bases you'd expect a supersharp shooting girls' night out to include. With nods and winks to Neneh Cherry's buffalo stance and the US swing out sisters' lush vocal harmonies, The Spice Girls ensure that any attempt to belittle them musically is futile. Just submit and accept that this is truly a supersonic soundtrack for the 21st century.
THE bulletin board: The people behind the remarkable Gag promise fun of a similar kind when the Powderbubble club takes to The Red Box on December 21st - Dublin's leading drum & bass club Quadraphonic have the Logical Progression crew in The Kitchen tonight and Metalheadz spice girls Kemistry & Storm in the same venue on December 20th - A Night In Havana brings an excess of Latino grooves and rhythms to Whelans next Wednesday, while the same venue hosts The Event - Guile's Christmas Cracker the following night - The mighty David Holmes is at Influx in The Kitchen on St Stephens' Night. After his awesome EPI dates over the summer and that stomping, My Mate Paul single, this one should not be missed - Sundays are officially cool for clubbing nationwide. Joining Diskoakimbo and 2 Damn Funky in Dublin and the ever excellent Jazz Juice in Galway as places to go on the seventh day is Numb in Belfast.
Slo-mo beats for the laidback crew once a week at Katy Daly's (next door to The Limelight).
