"Rose" (82) is a widow living alone on a small farm in the north west. She has three children and eight grandchildren. Her two daughters live several miles away, and her son lives in the US. Rose grew up in the area, did clerical work for a local business, worked in England as a nurse for six years, before returning to marry a local farmer. She looked after her husband for several years before he died eight years ago. She is a member of the a local Active Age group and keeps busy with her garden, her sewing, making jam, reading and spending time with her family. She is anxious not to use her real name as she lives alone in a remote area and is fearful that she may be attacked in her home.

Solitude

I miss my husband but I'm not lonely. I have no pets. When I go away, what would I do with a pet? It's quiet here, only the sound of the wind or the noise of the river. I like my privacy and my independence. I like to know I have people living nearby who care about me.

The Land

My husband farmed sheep and cattle on 50 acres but my son didn't take much of an interest in the farm. We sold the land and kept three acres around the house.

Family

I'm the oldest of four and I'm the only one left. My sister-in-law is still alive and we go to bingo together once a week.

I have two daughters and one son. My daughters live a few miles away, but my son is abroad and I miss him. He is married there now and he has his own family and his own house. He says property prices in Ireland are too dear. A site around here could cost £80,000, so I know what he means.

I love my grandchildren. They come to visit me a lot and sometimes they stay the night. The oldest is 22 and the youngest is seven. I've been teaching the girls how to sew and knit. One of them has already made a pincushion, and she's only nine. I used to knit them cardigans every winter, but you can't buy wool anymore and they don't wear knitted things as much.

Money

I have a pension of £96.50 a week which I collect with my daughter. I get Living Alone allowance and Over-80 allowance.

I don't pay electricity because I don't use enough units. My TV licence is free and I get £5 a week towards my fuel for six months of the year. My phone bill can be expensive because of ringing England and America.

I believe in having nice things. I have enough to buy my own clothes and I take a holiday now and then.

The past

I left school early and spent three and a half years in the Tech learning shorthand and typing. I got my first job when I was 18, doing clerical work for a local business. Then I worked in England, just after the war, from 1945 to 1951. I worked 12 hours a day as a trainee nurse and I was very homesick. Most of the time I was looking after psychiatric patients. When I was working at the Royal Earlswood Hospital in Surrey, I saw the Queen's nieces. They were mental defectives and no one ever visited them.

I got married 49 years ago. My husband was a neighbour. I was home from England on a holiday and he asked me [to marry him] then. He must have been looking for a woman! It was strange, coming into my husband's house with his mother already here. I was so shy because it wasn't my house. The house was smaller when I got married and we had an outdoor toilet. We built on an extra room in 1963 and in 1981 we built a kitchen and bathroom extension.

We lived off the farm. We cut our own turf and grew our own vegetables. Times are different now. People get everything in the supermarket. We grew our own turnips and they were so easily cooked. Now you'd buy a turnip and you'd be boiling it forever.

Support

I help to raise funds for the Active Age group I'm involved in and it can be very discouraging because I get so many refusals. We want to organise exchange visits with other groups from across the border, we want to go on trips to the Hawk's Well theatre in Sligo, and we want to run weekly classes for our group. But it all costs money. I make the phone calls and fill out all the forms. It's very time-consuming. And then so often we get turned down.

Our Active Age group is involved in a writing project called the Rainbow Project, which is supported by the Monaghan Peace and Reconciliation Fund. We have a lady who comes and helps us transcribe our memories: stories of school, customs, dances, marriage, childbirth. She was asking us if we'd had made (arranged) marriages and some people in the group did have that. It was very different then because if a woman was getting married to a farmer, she'd have to have £100, and he'd have to show the farm was in his own name.

The group is great because we are always planning something. We got three new bus-stops in the area through the county council. We have a special minibus that collects everyone for the weekly meetings and drops them home afterwards. It's a chance for people to do a bit of shopping as well. All the members are women - but we'd take a man if we could get one! We're all widows.

I have a home help for an hour twice a week. She does the Hoovering, cleans the cooker and the bathroom. I have an ulcer on my leg and a community nurse comes to visit and change the bandage. That's why I'm so lame and hoppy around the house.

I have a travel pass and a pass for a companion which means if I want to bring anyone with me who is over 16, they can travel free. I go to Mullingar sometimes to visit my niece, so the pass is handy.

Mobility

I never learned to drive. I regret that, but when I was younger the bicycle was all I could afford. My daughter brings me shopping once a week. My other daughter brings me milk and anything else I might need. I get brought to Mass on a Saturday evening and sometimes our parish priest comes to visit me at home. Rural Lift, a local transport scheme, is great, but it doesn't come to my area. It would be nice if older people could use their passes in taxis.

Because of the ulcer on my leg, I use a stick. I went on holidays to England with my daughter and her family during the summer and at the airport I had to get a wheelchair. It cost £10, even though I had a doctor's letter; we flew Ryanair. I went to the Folk Park in Omagh on another family outing and they have wheelchairs too. I didn't use it the whole time, but it was handy to get in and out of it whenever I got tired.

I have everything on the ground floor of the house now. I don't sleep upstairs; I only use that area for storage.

I got the range converted from coal to oil three years ago and it's great. We got the range in 1962; before that I cooked on the open hearth.

On a Tuesday I do my laundry. I tumble-dry it afterwards. I don't hang it on the line because I'd be afraid I'd slip and fall.

Safety

I lock up at night and my neighbours, who are family, look for my key in the door, or the light on. They'd notice a strange car. I have an alarm button around my neck at all times. If I press it, it rings in Dublin and they ring back to see if I'm alright. At first I didn't wear it - it was annoying me - but then I got used to it.

Where I live is quiet and safe and I've never heard of anything bad happening. But these days you never know what might happen. You get a bit frightened, living on your own.

Spare Time

I do painting classes - I like working in oils. You can be working on a few things at once. I paint local scenes, like Ben Bulben or Cavan College. In the winter I like crochet and sewing. I made a bag for my grand-daughter's confirmation, to go with her dress. I upholstered my armchairs myself. I made my own curtains with my sewing machine. I make jam too. I grow flowers and vegetables in my garden.

I don't go out much. I watch a lot of TV in the evenings: Coro- nation Street, Glenroe, Fair City and the cookery programmes. I like the News too. I watch videos with the grandchildren when they visit.

I never have a dull moment, but I'm never too busy either.

Health

Apart from my leg, I've nothing really wrong with my health. I take a tablet to reduce my blood pressure and one for my heart, because I have an irregular heartbeat. I'm very comfortable with my central heating, which I got in 1996.

I don't know what my secret is, how I managed to live so long. I worked hard, but maybe I was good to myself too!

"Rose" in conversation with Katie Donovan