I am either the bravest or the stupidest person in The Irish Times and as I pull on the yellow rubber gloves and stare at the red hot chilli pepper glowering menacingly beneath me, I very much suspect it is the latter.

No one else in the building would consider touching the Carolina Reaper - the hottest chilli in the world according to Guinness World Records - yet here I am getting ready to eat it.

The first thing I thought when I heard about this variety of Komodo Dragon chilli arriving on Tesco’s shelves was: “I want to try one.”

My second thought was: “Are you insane?”

So I dismissed the idea as too foolhardy. Then hours later the news editor appeared at my shoulder and said: “Will you eat the hottest chilli in the world? It will be a bit of fun.”

For who?

I agreed and set about recruiting others to take part in a chilli-off.

“It will be fun,” I said, parotting his words of wisdom. There were no takers.

Now I am on the roof of The Irish Times with regular chillies, bird's eye chillies and the Carolina Reapers lying in front of me.

I take a bite of the regular chilli. It is grand. Emboldened, I take a bite of the bird’s eye chilli. It too is grand, although it has a heat that creeps up on you.

It is only after 10 seconds or so that my eyes begin to water. But it is manageable.

Rubber gloves

It is time for the Carolina Reaper. I put on the rubber gloves which the folks at Tesco had thoughtfully included in my chilli pack and slice a sliver off the wrinkly red pepper and pop it into my mouth.

Almost instantly, it explodes with the heat of a thousand suns.

My eyes start to stream as bitter stinging tears infused with chilli roll down my reddening cheeks.

I begin to splutter and cough.

“Milk, I must have some milk,” I think to myself. I drink a pint of it. Then another pint. The pain goes on.

I take off the gloves and sweep the detritus of the grim reaper from the table. Then, without thinking, I rub my eyes.

Big mistake. Even though my fingers had only the most fleeting contact with the chillies, I am now practically blinded.

I stumble back to my desk and start to type.

“Never, ever again,” I think to myself.

Packs of two or three Carolina Reapers are now on sale for €1.49 in 50 Tesco stores across the country. Buy them at your peril.