Hours before Sally Rowlette died, her husband, Sean, was sitting by her hospital bed, holding her hand, when he thought of donating her organs .
“We had never discussed it. It just never entered our heads,” says Rowlette. Sally was 36 when she died in controversial circumstances at Sligo Regional Hospital in February 2014. She had given birth to her fourth child the previous day.
Last December a jury found that Sally’s death was as a result of medical misadventure. The publicity was so intense that, unusually, Sean feels that the people who received the organs probably know that Sally was the donor.
“Every day I think: Sally’s not here, but at least there are three people walking around somewhere who would not be here without her, and that does help” said her widow.
Organ Donor Awareness Week begins on Saturday, March 28th, and Rowlette encourages others in his situation to make a decision like the one that has brought great comfort to Sally’s loved ones.
“It really was the darkest hour, but things go through your mind at a time like that. Sally was so young and had been so healthy. I knew she was not going to pull through, and I suddenly knew that this was something Sally would like. She was a very generous person: she would help anyone if she could. So I asked a nurse if it was possible.”
After a heartbreaking discussion with Sally’s family, who supported his decision , Sean asked the nurse to make the arrangements and in a few hours a transplant team had arrived at the hospital. He wheeled her to the theatre, where he handed her into the care of the transplant professionals.
Two men in their 20s and a woman in her 30s received Sally’s organs. Strict rules of confidentiality apply when organs are donated, but two families have contacted Rowlette anonymously to try to convey their gratitude.
“One family said they had already lost one son, and they were afraid they were about to lose another child who was on a transplant list. To read what those parents wrote and to see how much it meant to them really does help,” says Rowlette, who is from Dromore West, Co Sligo.
He also has a letter from one of the other families telling him that Sally’s gift was “truly miraculous”. They wrote that they hoped it would somehow help to ease his pain to know how he had helped them. “We always cherish your family member in our hearts and while not knowing you, we feel a kinship,” they wrote, in a letter that was passed on by the transplant team at Beaumont Hospital.
Rowlette says it’s not an easy decision to make at a time of great grief, but he is thankful that he and Sally’s family made that decision.
“It isn’t easy,” he agreed. “I have not answered those letters yet because it ’s too hard, but they have meant an awful lot; and when I am able to, I will reply.”
Looking back, he wonders why none of the medical staff asked him to consider donating Sally’s organs.
“I know staff have to be very sensitive, but maybe they could leave flyers around and just let families think about it. I am glad it occurred to me.”
Rowlette also says that with 700 Irish people on the waiting list for transplants, it’s important to know that you can donate a loved one’s organs without a donor card. “I did not know that, and other families probably don’t.”
Michael McHugh the chairman of the Sligo branch of the Irish Kidney Association, echoes Sean Rowlette’s plea to people to sign donor cards.
“I had to have dialysis three days a week for four hours each time, so a transplant changed my life,” says McHugh. “I was on the waiting list for 15 months, and at 2 o’clock one morning the phone rang and I had to be in Beaumont in three hours. The Garda gave us an escort from the M50 because there were roadworks, and when we got to Beaumont they wished me luck. I never looked back. Five years after the transplant, I wrote to the donor family letting them know that I was still doing well.”
Rowlette and his children attended a service of remembrance for donor families and recipients in Galway last summer, where they were publicly acknowledged. “It was very emotional ,” said Sean.
“I felt that the three people who got Sally’s organs could be there. One woman hugged me, and she was so emotional she could not speak. She could have been a mother.”
For organ donor cards LoCall 1890 543639 or Freetext the word “Donor” to 50050
