Quentin Fottrell tells us what's going up (and what's going down) this week.

Quentin Fottrelltells us what's going up (and what's going down) this week.

Going Up

Old Mr BrennanHis new radio ad about "Facebuke" is a scream: "You can't get much satisfaction out of a virtual sandwich and what would you spread your buther on?"

True BloodThis HBO series has Anna Paquin as Sookie, a telepathatic waitress in Louisiana, and Stephen Moyer as a proud "out-of-the-coffin" vampire.

READ MORE

Vanity videouploads Former The Young and the Restless star Brenda Dickson's 1980s Welcome to My Home lifestyle VHS is now a YouTube cult hit, spawning lots of parodies.

Dundalk, the Paris of the NorthIt's got fabulous accents, is home to Cúchulainn's castle and it's handy for shopping in Newry just across the Border.

About TimeThis exhibition at Dublin's Stone Gallery until December 23rd includes work by 22 artists, including young guns such as Ben Readman and Deirdre Hayden.

Strictly HandbagStill going after 14 years, it's in Dublin's Sugar Club on Fridays and The Loft in Monkstown on Saturdays, and it's two for the price of one before midnight.

GOING DOWN

Miserly café cultureSome Scrooges charge €3 for a coffee, don't have WiFi and cover their sockets with plastic. What the. . .? We'll take our laptops and lunch money elsewhere.

O'Connell Street treeWhat's wrong with putting up an actual real fir tree? That white, bauble-like monstrosity just screams 1980s avant-garde kitsch . . . and not in a good way.

Party circuit overlapWhy must all the good Christmas parties be on Dec 12th, 13th, 19th or 20th? We only have one pair of legs, one chat-up line, one party outfit and one liver.

I'm A CelebrityThey wish. Martina Navratilova aside, the last thing Timmy Mallet and the other no-names want is to be let out of anywhere. They are all eyeing the big "prize".

James NesbittIf he becomes the next Doctor Who, we are pulling the plug on it. How would he get his big head get through the door of the Tardis? Bring back Tom Baker!