BikeTest/Triumph American: An American take on the Triumph Bonneville: this was a combination that Geoff Hillfound almost irresistible, dsepite a few quibbles about it being sanitised.
The last time I rode a Triumph up the west coast of the States, every time I stopped, no sooner had I removed my helmet and picked the flies from my moustache than a man of a certain age would come wandering over, take a look at the name and tank and mutter the following.
"Triumph, eh? They still making motorcycles? Boy, when I was a young man I had a Bonneville that was the best bike on the block. Hell, the number of times I fell off her doing 90 down PCH, I lost count. Sure did love that bike, then had to sell her when I got married, although I'd give both arms and at least one of my legs to get my hands on another one."
I would always desist at this juncture from pointing out to them that with both arms and a leg gone, they couldn't really get their hands on anything, never mind fling their leg over it, and they would wander off into the sunset, thinking with a sort of wistful happiness of their lost youth.
Well, I have news for you, guys. Dig out those leathers, lift the sleeping cat out of your helmet and polish your goggles, for the Bonnie's back in town, and there's a version with your name written all over it.
No, not Jim or Bob or Dave, but the Triumph American, a US version of the retro version of the most famous bike Triumph ever made. And when we say a US version, we mean wide handlebars, forward pegs, lots of chrome and an exhaust so quiet that several times I stopped at traffic lights then wondered if the engine was still running.
It's basically a cruiser version of the legendary twin, with all the modern bells and whistles the revived marque has as standard throughout its range now.
The motor is the power plant common to the Scrambler, Bonnie and Thruxton, and shares many of the same attributes - a slick clutch and five-speed box that is so smooth, yet still so "British" it could give Leslie Phillps a run for his money.
The Japanese could learn a thing or two from this set-up, which is so easy on the rider that you forget you are even changing gear.
In any case, it hardly matters, with the 900cc powerplant providing plenty of effortless grunt whichever one you choose
The engine is low revving and pulls steadily, and the combination of the tried and tested twin and the excellent transmission make the bike glide along happily at all speeds up to and above motorway requirements.
The long, low-slung, torpedo-shaped pipes are simliar to the those on the Thruxton, except even quieter, although this demo model had such low miles - less than 400 on the clock - that this could change with a bit more road time.
All in all, a quiet, smooth, reliable and easy to ride cruiser that you could travel vast distances on without a care in the world. So, why doesn't it grab me quite as much as other Triumphs?
Maybe because I'd been spoilt recently with the monster Rocket III, the stylishly charismatic Thruxton and the retro yet innovative Scrambler.
The American doesn't put a foot wrong, but for many riders, it will be a little too tame for a bike of of its size.
The machine is obviously set up with the American market firmly in mind, and as we all know, the Yanks like things nice and comfortable.
It's also so quiet because of the strict noise emission laws in the States, which coupled with the softer tuning, make the bike at tickover as silent as Marcel Marceau - asleep.
Even at full blast this is never a bike that will wake the neighbours and have pensioners keeling over clutching the wreckage of their hearing aids.
We're talking soft, civilised and easy here.
Are we talking sanitised?
Well, we are in the sense that you may well want to get out a hacksaw and slice the end of the exhaust, or buy a slightly more rorty aftermarket set, but in terms of everything else, the American can't be faulted.
It looks fabulous, the clutch and gearbox are as smooth as Marks and Sparks' deluxe custard with extra cream, and you will feel, after a while, that you are being wafted through the world on a magic carpet woven from metal, chrome and boyhood dreams.
As for the steering, it's never going to be point and shoot, but you soon get used to the fact that this is a bike you steer by leaning alone. Try counter-steering, and you'll get a mildly disturbed tsk and a polite request not to do it again. The front end is also decidedly light and vague at walking speed, but again, you get used to it.
All in all, if you had a Bonnie in your youth, have been out of biking for years and want an excuse to ease back into the saddle, look no further.
Even if all your friends in battered leather jackets slag you off for being a big softie.
Factfile: Triumph American
ENGINE:865cc air-cooled, DOHC, parallel-twin with 270º firing interval; bore/stroke 90 x 68mm; compression ratio 9.2:1; fuel system twin carburettors with throttle position sensor and electric carburettor heaters
TRANSMISSION:primary drive gear, final drive X ring chain; clutch wet, multi-plate, gearbox five-speed
WHEELS:front alloy 12-spoke 18 x 2.5in, rear alloy 12-spoke 15 x 3.5in.
TYRES:front 110/90 18, rear 170/80 15
SUSPENSION:front 41mm forks, rear chromed spring twin shocks with adjustable preload
BRAKES:front single 310mm disc, two piston calipers, rear single 285mm disc, two piston calipers
DIMENSIONS:length 2420mm (95.2in), width (handlebars) 960mm (37.8in), height 1170mm (46.1in), seat height 720mm (28.3in), wheelbase 1655mm (65.2in), dry weight 226kg (497lbs), fuel tank capacity 16.6 litres (4.4 gal US)
PERFORMANCE:maximum power 55PS (54bhp) at 6750rpm, maximum torque 69Nm (51ft.lbf) at 4800rpm.
* The test bike was supplied by from Philip McCallen of Lurgan, 028 3832 9999, www.philipmccallen.com. Price in Northern Ireland £5,799. Price in the Republic €10,750, including taxes.