CYBER SORTER: Amanda Brownadvises on how to guard against bleary-eyed, shiny-faced photos of you taking over your Facebook wall
Dear Cybersorter,
My husband and I are very private people, but we signed up to Facebook because we wanted to be able to see pictures of our grandchildren from abroad.
Our daughter-in-law frequently posts unflattering photographs of one or both of us at family events, and tags them so they show up on our wall.
Posting them without our permission is bad enough – but being forced to trawl through dozens of pics where we’re shown shiny-faced, close-eyed, or with a glass in hand is downright embarrassing, especially as some old school and college acquaintances have befriended us too.
We’re sure she does it on purpose, but we don’t want to cause a family row about it. Is there a way to prevent our photographs being posted without our permission? Or do you suggest an alternative course of action?
PS
Dear PS,
Other than locking her in your basement (illegal but tempting), you cannot prevent your daughter-in-law from posting or tagging those pictures.
However, you can de-tag yourselves. You can also prevent the photos showing up on your wall. Click on “Account”, then “Privacy Settings”. Click “Customise Settings”. Scroll down to “Photos and Videos I’m Tagged In” – under “Things Others Share”. Click on the lock sign. Click “Customise”. Click “Only You”.
This doesn’t stop other Facebook users seeing these pictures, especially if your daughter-in-law has her privacy settings open.
Ask her politely not to post photos of you on Facebook, or at least not to tag them.
If you really can’t talk to her, and insist on rising above it, post some nice ones of her and tag them “our beautiful daughter-in-law”. If that doesn’t guilt her into stopping, then it’s time to stoop to her level.
You must have a few less-than-perfect pictures of her knocking around? If not, take some, upload and tag them, nothing too nasty, just a bit of nose picking or bottom scratching. Perhaps that one where she’s sunburnt and tipsy? It sends a clear message.
Dear Cybersorter,
I’m addicted to Foursquare, the location-based social network. At the office I’m the “mayor” – the person who “checks in” the most. I know it doesn’t mean much, but at least my boss knows how much I’m at work, and in this economy you can’t do that enough. When I go on holiday, would it be wrong to pay somebody at work to keep checking me in to keep my status?
CD
Dear CD,
Paranoia is rife and yours is out to get you. As a Foursquare player you are probably the competitive sort, and collect friends and followers like a minor but ambitious dictator.
Paying someone to keep checking in at work is cheating. You will also have to leave them with your phone.
This alone, I sense, may not deter you, so consider the following. Your boss knows you are away, so if she sees you checking in on Foursquare she will smell a rat – a rat that’s gone on holiday. That’s one stinky rat.
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5 pregnancy apps
50,000 Baby Names PlusFree from iTunes. Filter by boys or girls names, sort alphabetically or by popularity. Does not appear to offer a "shake" your phone and you have to name your baby whatever comes up option.
Pregnancy App€3.99 from iTunes. This app informs you about the development of the baby over the course of your pregnancy and claims to accompany you through it too, though it might be nice to find a human back up.
Pregnancy Alarm #1 Ovulation Calendar€0.79 from iTunes. An accurate ovulation calendar that's allows you to easily view "which days are best for fertilisation".
It even offers e-mail alerts with the option to email your menstrual calendar to anyone you wish. That should keep the boss informed.
Pregnancy food€0.79 from iTunes. The application contains eating plans, food nutrient charts and guidelines on vitamins and minerals.
Contraction Tracker€1.59 from iTunes. Contractions are timed, recorded and saved, categorised into different phases and plotted on a chart. It includes an alert as to when it might be time to head to the hospital.
Brilliant idea, but will people in labour calmly consult their iPhones?
Is She Pregnant AppFree from iTunes. This poses the question "is she pregnant or just fat?" Speculate with family, friends and colleagues. That should get you expelled, fired, sent to Coventry by your entire family.
Email cybersorter@irishtimes.com
