The line may be down the road and around the corner, but if the spot is new and "OMG so good," no doubt you will be queuing to see what all the fuss is about. However, trying to get up the line and in the door can be an epic ordeal of Game of Thrones proportions.
Your friend might be “just up there” but you’re just here and no amount of sorrying is going to excuse the fact that you are trying to skip. Unless, of course, you’re a VIP, then go ahead. It’s going to take just as long to find your name on the non-existent list.
Personal space boundaries still apply in queues. I know you’re swaying in your five-inch heels but that doesn’t mean you can lean on our shoulders. If the queue isn’t moving neither should you, and smiling while you’re moshing into us won’t make the line move faster.
You are not equipped to operate that umbrella after four glasses of Pinot Grigio and we value our eyesight. Same goes for clutching a cigarette millimetres from our new coat, skin and highly-flammable L’Oréal Elnett-misted hair.
If and when you finally make it in and you join the queue for the bathroom, don’t stop the girl who bolts past you with her hand over her mouth. Letting her go will serve you better than any queue etiquette advice you can give her.
Rachel Murphy