Sometimes you need a real holiday. Not a frantic dash to some resort in the sun with free watersports, kiddies clubs, all night dancing and 6 a.m. towel drops. Sun holidays with families can be far more stressful than staying at home - especially if the flights aren't direct and you end up having to sleep for the first day to get over the journey through various hellish airports.
We have had plenty of highly charged family holidays on beaches and in villas, but this time we decided to do something different: a completely adult holiday, just for a week, with friends. We booked it months in advance, paid the deposit, and ogled the hotel's website on the Internet. But things conspired against us and, as the time approached, there seemed no option but to cancel the holiday. Our childminder left, a new one was starting, and we had told her that we never took breaks away from the children. Work was busy, money was tight, and I reached for the phone to call the whole thing off. Too late, said our friendly but firm travel agent. You can cancel of course, but you'll still have to pay the full amount anyway. We went. The resort, the Elounda Beach on the north-eastern tip of Crete, turned out to be heaven. Book yourself in here for a week and your body will be very grateful. It's a place where the sun shines relentlessly and where many of the guests have the slightly dazed look of people convalescing from particularly stressful events - like floating their company for millions perhaps, or marrying a stunning girl a third their age. This is a family-run hotel on a grand scale that attracts its fair share of celebrities and plain old billionaires. The Duke of Westminster stays in the most expensive suite and members of U2 have been known to unwind here too.
The hotel wanders over several acres with the best rooms in tiered bungalows rising from the sea, a meander away from the main building where breakfast is served (more about that later). It is a place where utter peace reigns from one end of the day to the other and where the hardest decision you have to make is whether to sit on the beach or on the terrace, or down by the rocks, with the sea dashing in over your feet.
September is the best month to go, we were told by a couple who have had their holiday there every year for the last 28 years. The hotel was pleasantly full but not packed, and there was no question of having to wake at dawn to get that sun lounger. The weather was perfect. The temperature in September rarely dips below 80 degrees. In fact it is generally warm into October. Direct flights from Dublin to Crete make it a relatively stress-free journey, although beware of charter flights that leave in the middle of the night and land at a ghastly hour in the morning. We were booked on one of these. Arriving at about 6 a.m., we were so tired that bed was the only thing for it.
We went straight to the room, walking along a pathway that has an intense blue sea on one side and gorgeous villas on the other, with bursts of flowers cascading down the low stone walls. Our room was up a short flight of steps with our own terrace where a white-hot sun sent us dashing inside. The rooms are cool, with tiled floors and unusual built-in beds, and a large cool marble-clad bathroom. On the first day we slept until the afternoon, waking up to a dazzling view of the water and our friends sunbathing on the far side of a tiny bay. A pattern quickly emerged - lying in sun and shade all afternoon, snooze, cocktails, dinner, bed and next day that breakfast.
This was a sensational meal, taken on big shady terrace with food chosen from an incredible buffet that took up two large rooms. Forget the average breakfast buffet with dried out bacon, sausage and eggs all hardening at the edges and bowls of cereal offered alongside jugs of not-cold-enough milk. This buffet was different. Every fresh fruit and fruit juice one could think of, different breads, rolls and cakes, cold meats, cheeses and smoked fish for the Germans, freshly made waffles the size of dinner plates and a special omlette section where no fewer than three chefs stood, making omlettes to order. And for those needing a pick-me-up, champagne.
The trick was not to make an absolute pig of oneself but still eat enough to carry one through to dinner. There are several restaurants and cafes in the resort, including a simple Greek cafe under a loggia and a smart Asian restaurant on the seafront but our favourite spot was the Vaghera bar, a big circular bar at the end of a pier leading away from the hotel out to sea. Here, sitting in huge, curl-up-in rattan armchairs under a canvas awning that rolls and flaps in the breeze like the sails of a ship, you can take morning coffee, afternoon tea, cocktails and sundowners. We were never out of it.
We did leave the resort a couple of times, once to visit Knossos which was absolutely crammed with tourists and faintingly hot, and once to stroll down to Elounda village a few minutes away. This is a lively place with souvenir and jewellery shops that stay open until midnight staffed by cheery Shirley Valentine types who will tell you that they came there years ago and just stayed on. The week flew although we seemed to do nothing but loll around in the sun like lazy lizards. Every so often, though, that is exactly what's needed.
The Elounda Beach can be booked through Dublin travel agency The Holiday Shop. Rates start at £880 sterling for flights and one week's B&B based on two people sharing. Tel (01) 6792931. For more information click on www.eloundabeach.gr