Compiled by Shane Hegarty
Maverick 'winking her eye'
Enda Kenny, Senator Frank Feighan and Denis Naughten gave a lusty rendition of the Rodgers and Hammerstein number O What a Beautiful Morningin Clarke's Bar in Boyle, Co Roscommon, yesterday. They put a particular emphasis on the last line: "I've got a beautiful feeling, everything's going my way".
But there are other interesting lyrics. While the Oklahoma classic features a "bright golden haze on the meadow" (a rainbow haze?), it hints at a campaign that is not impressing in rural pockets. "All the cattle are standing like statues/ All the cattle are standing like statues/ They don't turn their heads as they see me ride by."
However, it does add: "But a little brown mav'rick is winking her eye." Perhaps this refers to an Independent TD who will need to be wooed to make up the numbers in the next coalition.
Does he amuse you?
Most politicians' CVs are boring affairs. A stint as a schoolteacher, followed by a run as local councillor and then several successful/ failed grabs for a Dáil seat. Obvious exceptions are those of the Socialist Party's Joe Higgins and Clare Daly, who have a spell in chokey on their resumés.
However, the biography of Laois-Offaly Labour Party candidate Jim O'Brien boasts of a "colourful career path". And he's not joking. He's a journalist, press consultant, house husband and has worked in the community and voluntary sector. He also nonchalantly explains: "I spent 11 years as a priest in the diocese of Limerick, got married . . . I write for comedian Pat Shortt and worked on the first series of Killinascully (above)." Sure enough, a check of the Internet Movie Database confirms that he contributed "additional material" to episodes of the successful sitcom. Now, if he could only do something about Pat Rabbitte's one-liners . . .
Quote unquote
"Would you take a look at my ingrown toenail, doctor?"
- Voter to North Dublin Fine Gael candidate (and GP) Dr James O'Reilly
All politics is local
Candidates are well used to hearing of matters which, while trivial to many, are utterly vital to the voter in question. On KCLR (Carlow-Kilkenny) radio yesterday morning, Labour candidate Jim Townsend revealed a most "unusual complaint" from a voter in Graiguecullen, Co Carlow, who told him that "the footpaths are too high to park on".
DIY cabinet
If you'd rather a pick 'n' mix cabinet than one made up of one or two parties, The Irish Timeswebsite is giving you the chance to make your own cabinet. Simply drag the politician (not kicking and screaming, though) to the rickety cabinet, and when you have your political dream team, you can then indulge yourself by throwing custard pies at them. You'll find the game at www.ireland.com/focus/election2007