Celebrity wedding rumour has media in a spin

AS rumours go it was perfectly plausible

AS rumours go it was perfectly plausible. Having cancelled their wedding plans because of "obsessive and intrusive" media coverage, the most controversial couple in modern music, Patsy Kensit and Liam Gallagher, had opted for a wedding in Dublin. On Valentine's Day of all days. It didn't get any better than this.

The Irish Times reacted to the smouldering rumour by dispatching at speed a reporter and two photographers to the Register Office in Molesworth Street, Dublin, in the hope of recording the happy event.

We waited. The woman at the reception of the Register Office laughed when told of the imminent nuptials. "Even if I knew, I couldn't tell you," she smiled. "I have had so many of your colleagues on to me and I have told them the same thing. This is not an official No, but, well, it's not happening."

There was talk outside the office about a pair of Patsy and Liam lookalikes whom the National Lottery had employed to advertise their Super Bonus Valentine Weekend Jackpot. Could they have been the source of the rumour?

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Yet if Liam and Patsy - who spent yesterday in their London home - had decided to get married in Dublin, it couldn't have been a last minute decision. Even if they managed to obtain a special exemption in the Dublin Family Circuit Court they would still have had to wait 31 days before enjoying their big day. They would also have had to declare their intentions in the Notice of Marriage Book.

Meanwhile, back in lookalike land Ms Jilly Lovell, aka Patsy Kensit, and Mr Peter Turner, aka Liam Gallagher, were enjoying themselves like only people who have led a nation's media on a merry dance can. "I think it's a scream," said Jilly/Patsy, who is from London and works "in accounts". "It's my 15 minutes of fame. If it causes a bit of a stir, then that's a laugh."

Peter/Liam, a self employed man from Dorset, was more contrite. "I feel sorry for the newspapers if it caused them hassle," he said, before quickly slipping back into character and declaring: "I could murder a pint of plain."