Coming out together for the carnival

Today's Gay Pride parade in Dublin will give young gay people a rare chance to feel a real sense of belonging, writes Fionola…

Today's Gay Pride parade in Dublin will give young gay people a rare chance to feel a real sense of belonging, writes Fionola Meredith

In the true spirit of medieval carnival, today's Gay Pride parade in Dublin will gleefully subvert the po-faced proprieties and prohibitions of daily life. Joyously anarchic, it will be an expression of colourful solidarity in the face of the prejudices which continue to impact on the lives of gay men and women in the Republic. And for the increasing numbers of young people taking part in the march, it will be a rare chance to feel a sense of real belonging, to become part of a big, noisy, happy, supportive family.

Somewhere among the riot of sequins, feathers, leather and rainbow flags streaming down O'Connell Street will be Lyn Corcoran (20) and her friends from Belong To Youth Project, a support group for LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered) young people aged 14 to 23. Lyn's first Pride march was in 2003, and she remembers the sense of awe she felt: "It was amazing - I'd never seen that many gay people at the same place and at the same time. But it can be difficult for younger people joining the parade for the first time. They'll see someone they know and say 'Oh my God, they're going to tell me ma!' It's a big thing to do." Eoin Farrelly (22), a Belong To facilitator, can't wait for the parade to begin: "There's just something in the air - you get the most incredible high, an overwhelming feeling of group energy. It's both an affirmation and a celebration."

Some young participants initially find the experience of Pride a challenge. Declan Kavanagh (18) says, "Last year was my first time and I found it surreal, weird. When you're walking in the parade, people stand and watch on either side of the road, and many of them are motionless, just looking at us, completely blank. It's strange, hard to interpret. It's as if the carnival atmosphere is up against a wall."

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Yet Declan believes there's a growing confidence among young Pride marchers: "There's a lot of exuberance within the younger crowd; there's a thrill in standing up and proudly affirming our identity, whereas a lot of the older people are more cautious, more restrained - maybe they'll wear a disguise because they're concerned about their jobs and their families."

Declan is an undergraduate at NUI Maynooth. He's also an accomplished poet whose work draws reflectively on his experiences as a young gay man. He believes that joining Belong To was a definitive moment in his life: "I was 16 at the time, and I was desperate to meet other gay people. I hadn't come out then, and I didn't know anyone else who was like me. Walking through the door the first time was difficult - rather like getting an injection with no one there to hold your hand. But once I made that first contact it was amazing. Something internal kicked in, something new. I started being myself in conversation. Finally, I could breathe - slightly cliched I know - but the feeling was real. I wasn't alone any more. I belonged."

A recent Northern Ireland study of LGBT young people found that the average age for a young man to realise he isn't heterosexual is 12, while for a young woman it's 13. Yet the average age when they first tell someone about their sexual identity is 17 for young men and 18 for young women. Michael Barron, director of Belong To, says, "this situation is changing, and an ever-increasing number of courageous young people are 'coming out' as LGBT at a younger age. Today many of these teenagers are actively raising awareness about their experiences and needs." But what are the needs of gay young people? "Largely the same as those of any young person - especially the need to feel secure in themselves, in who they are. It's about trying to break the sense of isolation through the provision of peer support - all teenagers need that; it's more important in these years than at any other time in their lives."

The young participants at Belong To are particularly concerned about bullying and marginalisation of LGBT youth in schools and communities, and the effect that this has on the fragile development of teenage self-identity. Research shows that young people who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual and/or transgender are at least three times more likely to attempt suicide. Declan describes this phenomenon as "internalised hatred - the sense that you're not worth bothering about." A recent survey carried out by Dublin City University found that 94 per cent of Social, Personal and Health Education (SPHE) teachers in single-sex schools and 82 per cent in co-educational schools were aware of verbal homophobic bullying in their schools. This study also found that 25 per cent of these teachers in single-sex schools and 17 per cent in co-educational schools were aware of instances of physical homophobic bullying. Yet 90 per cent of teachers indicated that there was no mention of gay and lesbian-related bullying in their school's bullying policy.

Sean Morrin runs the Ladz Project for gay and bisexual men aged 25 and under in Derry - scene of so many homophobic attacks that it has been dubbed "the gay-bashing capital of Northern Ireland". He believes that radical changes are needed in the education system, both North and South: "For too long, educators have shied away and pretended that homophobic bullying doesn't exist. Yet the most common word in the playgrounds is 'faggot'." And gay young people in the North face the additional challenge of living in a post-conflict society where homophobia has traditionally been seen as an "acceptable prejudice". James Knox of Belfast's Coalition on Sexual Orientation says, "The Catholic-Protestant situation is starting to minimise and people are just looking for another excuse to have a go at somebody else. Ethnic minorities, people with disabilities, gays and lesbians are easy targets."

But for one blithe day in Dublin the anxieties and tensions of life as a gay young person can be cast off. Lyn muses, "On the Pride march, you do sometimes get people handing out Bibles, shouting that we're going to hell. But I'll just laugh. Today I won't care."

www.belongto.org