Despite its widely recognised value to children, joint custody is still relatively unknown in Ireland. According to Eileen McRory, a family therapist who has done research on joint custody arrangements, this is largely due to a lack of understanding on the part of both the judiciary and parents.

"The courts don't have time to take all the needs into consideration, and traditionally mothers are granted sole custody here," she says. "Some mothers are afraid of how they will be regarded by society, others are worried about their exspouse's ability to parent. "It is important to have a look at whether the spousal conflict is affecting judgment here. Where a father has played a responsible role in relation to the children before the marriage broke up, it is reasonable to think he can continue in that role afterwards. If a father didn't play an active role beforehand, it may just be that he didn't take the opportunity to do so. "I have found no evidence that fathers are less adequate as parents. Actually, both parents find themselves carrying out a wider range of parenting tasks after marital breakdown, tasks which are new to both of them."

Joint custody is not simply a legal arrangement whereby parents share care of their children on a 50-50 basis, McRory says. "Joint custody is about children having a meaningful relationship with both parents. It doesn't have to be legally binding - parents can work out a system which suits them through mediation services. "The amount of time spent with each parent depends on what will realistically work - the children's ages, how near the two homes are, parents' work demands and so on. The fundamental issue here is that parents share responsibility and authority for their children. "Joint custody, or shared parenting is not an easy solution for parents," she adds. "It requires a lot of effort. But everyone can benefit. It gives each parent some time off from parenting and, because there is a guarantee of being with the children, parents are more likely to be flexible. Children are affected in some way by separation, but the extent to which they are affected long term depends a lot on the parenting arrangements."

Liam O Gogain is the chairperson of Parental Equality, an organisation set up to argue for the equality of mothers and fathers as parents.

"I was the first father to be granted joint custody of my children in this State," he says. "That was in 1991 and there was no information available on how to work out an arrangement like this. Things have improved now, I have a lot of emotional and practical support from friends, family and work colleagues, but the demands of working and being a single parent are very stressful and I manage to balance the needs of both with a lot of difficulty. "The difficulties are compounded by the lack of awareness of the needs of shared parenting in Irish society. Even basic things - like keeping parents informed on school issues by sending a note home in the child's bag - are a problem unless there is good communication between parents."

Liam has his two sons, aged nine and 10, from Monday to Thursday every week. "The point about the time my children spend with me is the normality of the situation. I do all the parenting functions, I know what they are up to, I know their friends - it's about all the normal stuff that parent-child relationships are made of. "The biggest benefit to the children is that instead of having half their cultural heritage, they have their two extended families available to them. The other huge thing is the sense of security the children have - they know I am fully in their lives. "For my part, the presence and love of my children keeps me going. It is stressful, but you pay a terribly large price in the long term if you transfer the energy of raising your children into a career."

Norman Newell has had joint custody of his children, a boy and a girl aged eight and nine, for two-and-a-half years. "The children don't spend half the time with me and half with their mother, but we have equal responsibility for their upbringing," he says. "When they are with me I have full care of them - I am not simply a babyminder, looking for permission and acting according to instruction. "I used to run around frantically trying to entertain them; now I realise it is much more important just to do whatever everyone else does. You can't really form a bond if you spend the whole time taking them out for treats." At first his children found the new situation difficult. "They felt they were different to other children and they missed me not being at home anymore. It is still hard when we aren't together, and I miss them a lot. But having joint custody provides them with real stability; they have adapted to having two homes and they talk to their teachers about things they do in `Daddy time' quite happily. "I am 100 per cent involved in their lives, and I feel we will probably form a stronger bond than if I was still married because when we are together it is just me and them now." Both men say joint custody arrangements should be the norm. "At the moment fathers have to battle in court for joint custody, and they rarely win, but sole custody is detrimental to both the children and the parents," Liam argues. "Rather than making it so hard, we need a Staterun service that facilitates shared parenting, offering information and helping alleviate fears which can exacerbate difficulties between parents."

Norman agrees. "Custody should only be taken away from a parent in very specific cases," he says. "Parenting is the issue, not custody, but there is an urgent need for advice and support systems to enable parents to share the care of their children effectively."