I’m at my wits’ end. My son started back in fifth year in September but has completely disengaged with school. He reads the books, but won’t go to school. He’s 17 – above the legal age for compulsory school – so he can’t be forced to return. What are our options?
The fallout from Covid-19 has left many vulnerable young people feeling incapable of re-engaging with their pre-pandemic lives. Your son’s unwillingness to return to school is, as you outline in your email, causing the family deep distress.
To get the root of his issues, engaging with a professional counsellor would be a good start.
As you say, legally, he is no longer legally obliged to attend full-time education. As a result, support such as homeschooling will not be available for him.
He remains on the school’s roll books and his name will have been returned to the Department of Education in recent weeks as a current student at the college.
You have stated that you have had some success in getting your son to engage with the textbooks you purchased from the book lists provided by his school. Unfortunately, given the return to normal teaching practices, the possibility of him viewing his classes online is no longer an option.
All you can do is engage with whatever support you can muster and try and stop him withdrawing any further
However, his teachers have a responsibility to support his education as much as is practicable. So, if he is prepared to submit work to them, I am certain that they would correct it, and return it to him with some guidance as to how to proceed with home study.
The combination of therapeutic support and encouragement/engagement from his teachers, if provided, may help him in time to overcome his anxieties and gradually re-engage with his education.
Fears and anxieties
I have seen students return to schooling for as little as a class or two a day initially, as a way of gradually overcoming their fears and anxieties.
If none of these strategies come to fruition, it is not the end of his educational journey. In the short term, I would encourage him to seek a part-time job locally, to get him out of the house and engage with people outside of his family.
In time, if he develops an interest in some career area, he may well be able to secure a place on a level four/five course through your local Education Training Board. This could open up a pathway to higher educational opportunities if he so desired.
Right now, all you can do is engage with whatever support you can muster and try and stop him withdrawing any further from interaction with the world outside your front door.
The past 18 months have been particularly difficult for a significant group of our young people. Supporting the gradual recovery of their confidence and self-belief must become a top priority for all relevant individuals, institutions, and statutory bodies.
