The Bigger Picture: One of the most powerful tools we have is belief. Belief in our self can make dreams come true. Belief in others can change the world. Although we rarely consider it important, a lack of belief in each other hurts. Today, there's far too much lack of belief around, Shalini Sinha.
Parents lack belief in their children. Managers lack belief in their employees, and vice versa. Friends lack belief in each other. Our inability to support, trust, encourage and promote each other has profound effects.
At the root of any lack of belief in others is a lack of belief in one's self. It is not normal to sell ourselves short, or anyone else for that matter. Cynicism is not inherent in our nature, but born from our injuries of long ago. When well nurtured, they spend the rest of our lives growing.
Our early experiences of confusion fear and injustice can yield adult-sized blind spots sheltering us not only from the goodness and inspiration around us, but from the real power and potential within ourselves. Pain and struggle keep our heads down, having us repeat old patterns and enforcing limits. It is history that keeps us reactive rather than risking fresh, new, creative responses. While the worst consequence of this is how we sell ourselves short, equally tragic is how we participate in holding others back.
Rather than being "realistic" or "pragmatic", cynicism is truly destructive. It is the pre-occupation of a hurt child imagining as reality a less dynamic world. It is the embodiment of a lack of belief dressed up with a credibility and momentum it neither earned nor deserved. It is not cynicism but creativity, love, risk and interconnectedness that have always moved mountains and touched hearts. These should be what define our world and every move we make in it.
If cynicism does not define the human spirit, then "limitless imagination" does. It is from our unhindered intelligence and profound humanity that we are able to discover passion and bring meaning to life. It is the "idealistic" and "emotional" who are able to be true to themselves and promote fairness for those around them. Yet, these words are considered weapons in today's world, to dismiss and deny impassioned voices.
As babies, meaning, connection and inner power are expected ways of being. It is only when subjected to someone else's lack of belief that we become confused and wounded. We learn to survive within artificial but tangible limits. No matter how common or irritating doubt and distrust are, it is genuinely painful when they come to us from someone we rely on and love deeply.
Yet, it is these people - whose world is formed in part by us, whose emotions are so intensely tied to us - who are most likely to show us anger when we walk too close to the edge, shudder when we choose a most difficult path, and be lost to grief when we reveal our most painful moments. Although it is these people we need most (and who most want to show us love and support) their own struggles betray them.
While our apparent hurts enclose those we love, our less apparent struggles allow us to perpetrate injustices without even knowing. Our limited imagination shrinks the world around us. We take for granted systematic mistreatment and walk away when those in pain are trying to gain our ear. We lack the stamina and strength to stay, watch or listen. We simply do not notice.
Our lack of intention - our own ignorance - does not excuse us, however. That would be the greatest imaginable display of lack of belief and concession of inferiority. Still, the lower our own self-belief, the harder we will fight to deny and protect injustice. Ironically, unless we decide to believe more in ourselves today, we will never be able to ask for more tomorrow.
From this comes one of the great meanings in life - the path of fulfilment, awareness and joy. If we have been assaulted to the point of forgetting who we are, than the only possibility for realising our potential is to push against our fears and risk believing we are worth more. We must let ourselves have high expectations. We must reach out for life and one another even when we fear it.
Most of us can feel our own heartbreak when we push against a pain or weakness. But, developing the strength to open up to this heartbreak allows us to learn, grow and begin to see what for years we could not see. It requires a commitment that we will make things better - we will believe, encourage, risk and not settle for less. This can nurture a genuine belief in oneself and humanity.
Shalini Sinha is an independent producer and journalist. She is a counsellor on women's issues, has lectured on women's studies in UCD and presents RTÉ Television intercultural programme Mono.